It starts, naturally enough, with a chapter on human sacrifice. It is grim, violent, and soaked in blood. A delightful amuse-bouche this isn't! But it makes the case that this is (part) of the origin of our modern table manners.

We no longer need to appease the gods and secure a plentiful harvest, but those rituals echo down because they are hewn into our culture.

Ritual is action frequently repeated, in a form largely laid down in advance; it aims to get those actions right. Everyone present knows what should happen, and notices when it does not. Dinner too is habitual

Food is performance. It is something I think I instinctively knew, but it is fascinating having it spelled out in such a blunt fashion.

a meal can be thought of as a ritual and a work of art, with limits laid down, desires aroused and fulfilled, enticements, variety, patterning, and plot.

A meal has a plot?!? Well, of course! The starter, main, and dessert are our beginning, middle, and end. A meal that starts with chocolate mixed with cauliflower and finishes with a roast drenched in porridge is as nonsensical as a murder mystery with no murder and a Hobbit scarecrow as the protagonist.

For a book about dinner, it is quick to point out that manners and ritual invade every aspect of our life. The prose is stunningly prescient:

This is a time of transition, when old manners are dying and new ones are still being forged. A good many of our uncertainties, discomforts, and disagreements stem from this state of flux. Sometimes we hold the terrifying conviction that the social fabric is breaking up altogether, and that human life is becoming brutish and ugly because of a general backsliding from previous social agreements that everyone should habitually behave with consideration for others.

As a teenager, you probably whinged about all the "unjust" rules foisted on you by your parents and schools. Everything seemed so petty and counter-intuitive. Why can't you keep your elbows on the table and talk with your mouth full? Visser is a kind and patient teacher.

Other people inevitably make demands on us and inhibit us, partly in order to make room for themselves; we learn that it is in our best interests to play the game, because we also require the freedom which other people’s restraint allows to us.

Unlike other cultural books, this doesn't just focus on WEIRD nations; we're happily trundled off to explore the rituals of a dozen cultures. This could quite easily have fallen into the trap of "aren't other people strange!" but Visser is as clinical as an alien anthropologist. She perfectly observes our cultural foibles as well - making it clear that every culture is strange.

The formality of hamburgers lies in their relentlessly predictable shape, and in the superimposed and separate layers of food which make sophisticated references to parts of the sequential model for a formal meal.

The book is a delight. It would benefit from a few illustrations to help make some of the points clearer, but it is a fun and educational read.

This book was originally written in the 1980s and updated in the 1990s - but it is a timeless classic. Visser talks us through how a simple meal came to be, its history, and its consequences.

Much Depends on Dinner, the chronicle of a simple meal, includes therefore the consideration of massive modern environmental problems, as well as the questions of just distribution, of gratitude, and of respect that arise whenever we think honestly about food as the sustenance of life.

It is informative as a social commentary as much as it is about the history of food. I didn't know about American proclivities, nor about Peel's Brimstone, nor the ways in which certain foodstuffs were invented and marketed.

It's also a little upsetting to understand that, while homogenisation has increased yields and reduced prices, it has led to a reduction in biodiversity. And it is weird to understand the politics and science around margarine. It's full of smart little phrases like "Conspicuous Competence" which accurately describe the efforts we go to to impress others with food - and this was all written decades before YouTube!

Some of the topics are a little outdated, and the formatting of the eBook version has several transcription errors. A few of the diversions are a little padded - for example the sacred uses of olive oil - but overall it is a marvellous look at a topic most of us are fascinated by.

Some questions it left me with:

• Is there an atheist equivalent of "saying grace"? Should there be?
• What social politics and hierarchies do I accidentally enforce when I eat or consume?
• Are there foods which are no longer available which I would have liked to try?
• Do I really want to know how my (vegan) sausages are made?

I'll end with my favourite words of wisdom from the book:

The very best thing to do with ice cream when it is ready is to eat it at once — all of it. Keeping it always reduces the quality of its texture, consistency, and taste.

The pitch is simple. GreenChef will send you a big box of ingredients and a bunch of recipes to follow. You get exactly 175g of tomatoes, a precise number of lentils, and a sachet containing a perfect measure of spice. Follow the instructions and you'll have a tasty, healthy, and somewhat exciting dinner for two.

And, you know what? It works! Liz and I had great fun trying out some recipes which we normally wouldn't have attempted.

But... fuck me! It the instructions are needlessly complicated, the price is ridiculous, and the business practices are annoying.

Let's take the instructions first. Here's a sample from a recent meal:

Place the carrots in the oven for 20 minutes. Meanwhile slice the mushrooms. When the carrots have 10-15 minutes left, place the potatoes in the oven.

Errr... what? Why not just say "place the carrots in the oven. After 10 minutes, add the potatoes and cook for another 10 minutes"?

Similarly, the prep instructions are all over the place. Rather than getting everything washed, chopped, and peeled at the start, it can feel a little like a race against time.

This, to take a recent example, is listed as step 4 in a 6 part process:

Meanwhile, mix the flour and water for the slurry (see pantry for both) together in a small bowl to make a flour slurry.

Heat a large frying pan on medium-high heat with a drizzle of oil. Add the green beans and stir-fry until starting to char, 2-3 mins.

Reduce the heat to medium-low, add the red Thai style paste, vegetable stock paste, ginger puree, lime juice, and water for the sauce (see pantry). Stir to combine, then add the flour slurry, increase the heat to medium and simmer until thickened, 5-6 mins.

The recipe cards have relatively tiny print which means they get easily smudged with any stray drops of water - making the whole thing a little frustrating.

But! The meals have been delicious. And the couple who cooks together... errr... has fun together?

The price is another barrier. I received a discount from a friend for our first few boxes - but we couldn't justify the cost after that. At full price, it's about £6.25 per person per meal. True, that's a heck of a lot cheaper than eating out. But it's considerably more expensive than buying the ingredients at a supermarket.

Part of the problem is that you get sent a single-serving sachet of, say, vegetable stock. It would be more efficient to buy a whole jar. Similarly, the delivery price for 3 meals is the same as what you'd pay for an entire grocery shop for any supermarket.

Because of the price, we gave up on the boxes. Until we ran into the company at a trade show. Their rep acknowledged that the price was high and recommended signing up with a new email address to take advantage of their promotional discounts! So we did.

Which brings me on to their other annoying business practices. The discounts they offer are very weirdly staggered - so I was never quite sure how much I'd be paying each week.

Which wouldn't be too much of a problem - except they don't send out reminder emails for what this weeks box is or how much it will cost. I asked their customer support about that and they straight up admitted that they didn't send reminders so people wouldn't have a chance to cancel!

That also meant I couldn't choose from the recipes on offer. They were all nice, but I'd have felt better if I was more in control.

Which brings me on to the final annoyance. Substitutions. It's understandable when your supermarket runs out of branded items and subs you with an inferior product. It's a bit annoying when a premium service does it. One of the meals was supposed to contain a selection of exotic mushrooms. Instead we got a bag of ready-slices chestnut mushrooms!

Look, OK, not the end of the world, but makes the whole thing feel a bit cheap.

Verdict

I can't deny that the meals are tasty. While the instructions aren't great, they're all pretty simple to cook. And, with the discounts, worth it as an occasional treat.

What I don't understand is why the supermarkets haven't got in on this game yet? Why do they make me buy ingredients like a chump, rather than let me buy meals?

Anyway, if you'd like a discount on GreenChef's veggie friendly meals you can use my referral code and we'll both save money.

Anyway, I saw this on sale and thought I'd take a punt on it. What's the worst that could happen?

The technology is pretty basic. Point an over-powered hair-dryer into an enclosed space, have a motor gently stir the bowl, wait. Done.

Although there are a variety of programmes, there's no "smarts" here. It isn't like the YumAsia Mini Panda Rice Cooker which knows exactly when the rice is cooked. You have to wait and watch things cook. Like a 20th Century person! Similarly, there's no WiFi connection - so you have to use the built in timer-delay rather than use an app like a normal person. Eugh!

And, you know what? It works. I put in frozen oven chips and pressed the button marked "chips".

The chips cooked.

They tasted nice.

Terence Eden is on Mastodon

@edent

Replying to @edentHmmmmm!

Does make a noise like a small hair drier. pic.x.com/quqCJ0t0A6

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Terence Eden is on Mastodon

@edent

Replying to @edentWell, it has cooked frozen oven chips to perfection.
Same amount of time as our main oven, but a lot less power.
Will try it with a stir fry & other things over the week.
It is this model: amzn.to/3CphlKQ
The inelegantly named Tefal ActiFry Genius+ 1/2Kg. pic.x.com/M4gSUs7O8S

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There are a few advantages over using a full oven. The main one is that it uses less power. It plugs into a standard 13 amp socket rather than a dedicated 16 amp line. It's heating a smaller amount of space for about the same amount of time, so is relatively efficient. The stirrer makes sure things are cooked evenly. Finally, the big window lets you see exactly how well things are cooking.

Oh, and all the parts are dishwasher safe. Which is handy.

I tried a stir-fry in it - because I'm too lazy to use a wok and spoon. As per the instructions, I drizzled in exactly 14ml of oil. A bunch of chopped veggies and tofu chunks . I threw them all in at the same time - again, because I'm lazy - and started the parochially named "wok food" programme.

And it was basically fine. The veggies and tofu were cooked. It was crispy without being too oily. Took 25 minutes unattended which, coincidentally, is exactly the same time as a portion of rice in the other gadget.

I stuck in some frozen sausages and hash browns - but I took out the stirring paddle. 25 minutes later they were cooked. The ones directly under the heat source were a bit more well done - but not burnt.

I chopped a couple of potatoes into exactly 1cm chips. Washed and dried them. Mixed up a glug of oil and paprika - and stuck them all in the pan. In half an hour I had some decent chips. Were they as good as chip shop chips fried in an unhealthy amount of oil? No. But they were as good as regular oven chips.

For once, I didn't get the Internet connected one (I know, right?!) but it does have a little app with a bunch of recipes which is pretty handy.

It even plays a little beeping tune once done.

Is it the Best-Thing-Ever™? No. But it is great if you want no-hassle cooking. A bit of prep, chuck it in, wait, eat. It is counter-top friendly, cheap to run, and relatively cheap to buy. This was on special offer at £120.

Downsides

The main issue is that it is a bit noisy. About the same as an extractor fan.

The bowl is perfectly sized for our needs - but you can't fit, say, a whole chicken in there to roast. Similarly, if you're doing a bigger meal like burger and onion rings and chips and a pie for dessert, you might find it easier to shove everything in the main oven.

The UI is a little odd. It is all button and symbol controlled. But you'll probably find one setting that you like and just use that for everything.

Size wise it is about the same as a food processor. A little chunky if you have a small kitchen.

It also makes you seem like an insufferable hipster who believes a kitchen isn't complete without a dozen gadgets.

So, yeah. I'm going to keep experimenting with it. It isn't revolutionary - but it is quite handy.

Then, without warning, my body decided that producing the human lactase enzyme was for losers. Stupid body! No more cheese for me 😭

The UK has come on leaps and bounds in the last 20 years. When I first became a salad-aficionado, the vegetarian options in most restaurants was either a mushroom risotto or to go hungry. Nowadays, even the most ardently pro-carnivore establishment has a range of veggie- and vegan-friendly dishes.

I am a dietary vegan. Due to my health condition, I abstain from milk. I saw a Tweet the other day which made me wonder how many people in the UK will become economic vegans?

Andy Barr

@10Yetis

Lots about milk prices in the media. I looked at @MyAlertr* to see the price increase from June21 to now.
2pint, blue top.
@Morrisons 🔼 58% (79p - £1.25)
@Tesco 🔼 43% (80p - £1.15)
@waitrose 🔼 34% (89p - £1.20)
@sainsburys 🔼 43% 80p - £1.15)
BTW. We track hundreds of prices pic.x.com/vqcvlkdfet

---

The price of dairy milk is now at parity with oat-milk and soya-milk. Yes, I'm sure there are some things for which plant milk is unsuitable. But if you're a "splash of white stuff in my coffee" kinda person, or "drench my cornflakes with something wet and tasty" milk user, then a swap to plant-milk may make economic sense.

(Yes, most plant milks are fortified with the vitamins and minerals you'd get from bio-lactations.)

Even if you ignore all the environmental benefits of switching from cow-milk to plant-milk, it's hard to ignore the benefit to your bank balance.

The meat-substitute "Quorn" was originally part of a programme to prevent mass-starvation. Researchers foresaw a population explosion and a meat-protein shortage. Without a cheap and nutritious source of protein, people would suffer.

At retail, Quorn is about £6/Kg for 13% protein. Beef mince is about £4.50/Kg for 18% protein. Textured vegetable protein (TVP) is about £5/kg for 47% protein. Chicken breast is about £6/Kg for 30% protein.

So, depending on your needs and preferences, it may save you money to switch to a vegetarian/vegan source of protein. Of course, their prices also fluctuate.

But, yeah, change is scary. If you know that you like one specific brand, you'll be reluctant to change.

If you have sensory issues, it might be difficult or impossible to try something else.

And, sure, learning how to cook something new is complicated. But a veggie burger is cooked in exactly the same way as a beef burger. And sandwich filler is just thin slices of pink "stuff".

To be clear, I don't really care if you go veggie or not. I do it for my own reasons - mostly health and ethical. And I'm sure your reasons for staying omnivorous make perfect sense to you.

Anyway, next time you're browsing the aisles of your supermarket, take a look at some of the vegan alternatives. Chances are you'll find some things are cheaper than the non-vegan equivalent.

OK. But Why?

Food waste is a big issue. People throw away lots of perfectly edible food. They also discard tonnes of packaging. The next logical step, it seems to me, is to have edible packaging. Bananas are well known for their thick protective coating. It's just plant matter, so why can't it be eaten to help reduce waste? You add citrus fruit peel to all sorts of dishes for flavour, so why not give the humble 'nana a go?

OK. But How?

• Wait for your banana to ripen - it should have no green on it, and be going dark and spotty.
• Wash the unpeeled banana and dry it.
• Chop off a few cm from the top and bottom.
• Slice the peel away in strips.
• Eat banana!
• With the back of a knife, scrape off the inside layer of the banana peel and discard.
• Marinate

OK. But What?

I made a basic marinade. Big glug of dark Soy Sauce. Couple of dashes of tobasco. Squirt of golden syrup / honey. Sprinkle of smoked paprika and garlic powder. Basically, whatever flavours you'd like. Then leave for a couple of hours.

Then cook.

Heat up oil in a pan. Add strips.

Let it sizzle for about 90 seconds on each side.

Take from the pan and dry on some paper towels to remove excess oil.

Then eat.

OK. But Eat?

Yup! Try a little nibble first, just to make sure it's OK. Then munch. Try it on top of plain rice, or in a sandwich, or with an omelette, or... you know what? You're a clever cook, figure it out.

Tastes like bacon!

OK. But Bacon?

I'll cheerfully admit that this tastes as much like bacon as bacon-flavoured crisps do! It is a "flavour carrier" recipe. It's salty and spicy. If you over-cook it, then it is a bit like American crispy bacon in texture. Undercook it, and it's a bit like squidgy Danish bacon. Get it just right and it's a bit more like jerky.

Even when I was a meat eater, I'd find that lots of meat was essentially just the flavour of whatever sauce you drowned it in. A cheap cheese burger is the same taste as a cheap veggie burger - mostly salt, cheese, pickle, and herbs. Your barbecue pork mostly tastes of BBQ sauce, so why not swap for jackfruit?

OK. But Really?

Yes! Really! I've had this dish twice and haven't died yet. No indigestion or other weird symptoms. I don't really believe the claims that banana skins are somehow magically nutritious or will cure your weird disease. It's just a fun and unusual dish to cook - and results in marginally less food waste.

Try it, what have you got to lose?

This is the YumAsia Panda Mini. It seemed to hit the sweet spot for physical size and price. For £80 you get a rice cooker, steamer, and utensils. Makes enough rice for 2 people. Although, when full, we felt like it was more like for 4. Depends on how hungry you are.

It's pretty easy. Measure out rice. Measure out water. Hit button. Wait for the machine to go beep. Eat rice.

One of the best things about it, is that it keeps rice warm without it drying out. So if your curry is taking longer than expected, the rice is ready the moment you are ready to eat.

The manual is well translated, and the interface is pretty simple to use. It has different settings for different sorts of rice. It also came with a recipe for a vegan chocolate brownie which could be made in the cooker. It was superb.

It's also possible to make porridge and other things in there.

Some sellers also have it in pink!

Ada Rose Cannon

@AdaRoseCannon

Replying to @edent@edent Woah this looks like an identical reskin of our rice cooker by a different brand, same buttons and shape!! pic.x.com/og80k2pft1

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The only downsides is that the internal bowl isn't suitable for a dishwasher. It's pretty easy to wipe down by hand though. Similarly, the condensation trap is at the back and a little fiddly to remove.

Overall, it's a lovely little gadget. Perhaps a tad extravagant. And I don't really understand what its "fuzzy logic" is meant to do. But it gives out perfect rice each time.

FAQs

"whY not jUST bOil rICe oN THe stoVe?"

Because when we're cooking half a dozen different dishes, it's a pain to keep an eye on the rice to make sure the water isn't boiling over, or that it hasn't gone dry.

"dOeS it CONneCT to the INteRnet?"

No. That would be silly. I love connecting things to the Internet. And I can see the value of leaving my office in the city and telling my house to have rice waiting for me when I get home. But I'm WFH for the foreseeable future, so it isn't that important to me. The cooker has a preset timer on it, if I know when I'm going to be hungry.

So I was delighted to find a local store to me selling all manner of Chinese meat-substitutes - including these amazing looking "Chicken" Drumsticks!

I ordered a bunch and cooked them up.

The "bone" sticking out of the end is bamboo. Chewable and sweet - but probably not for swallowing unless you really need extra roughage in your system!

The processed "meat" around it is delicious. A perfectly spiced mix of protein, mushroom, veggies and miscellaneous stuff. As with lots of foods, it is the seasoning and texture which makes the meal.

What should we call this product?

The Chinese word for chicken is 鸡. But this product is sold as 鳳 - "phoenix" in traditional script. I love that.

There's a slightly silly discussion going on at the moment - "Veggie discs to replace veggie burgers in EU crackdown on food labels". Should veggie things be allowed to name themselves after meaty things?

Is a disc of mushed veggies, or mushroom, or mycoprotein, a burger? Yes. I don't know any normal part of a healthy animal which is shaped like a burger. And the bits of animals shaped like hotdogs are rarely eaten.

I've eaten vegetarian food around the world and, yes, it can be confusing going to a restaurant in a foreign country and not knowing if the "Gemüse Lasagne" is actually vegetarian or merely served with vegetables.

It is weird going to a veggie restaurant and being served "mock duck" and "mock beef" and all manner of things which aren't-really-meat-but-we-need-to-pretend-they-are-for-some-reason. I get that we often refer to new things by comparing them to the things we already know.

I don't really care if the stuff I'm eating is called "Fakon" or fake bacon or textured soya strips in paprika or Dragon Flank. As long as that Ⓥ symbol is prominent, I think we can all enjoy the foods we want.

That's why I was overjoyed at ODF Plugfest Rome when the organisers made this announcement:

Terence Eden is on Mastodon

@edent

"All lunch boxes will be vegan (so that everyone can eat everything)"

THANK YOU! #LibOCon17 #odfplugfest Sensible inclusive policy. pic.x.com/zuqf0h14hx

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It was such a thoughtful thing for the event to do. We each got some fresh pasta, some salad, fruit, biscuits. Lovely!

(As an aside, yes, allergies and intolerances were catered for separately.)

Everyone I spoke to at the event was happy with the food. I didn't notice anyone sneaking off to one of the hundreds of pizza restaurants in the vicinity.

As someone who has run large scale events before, I think making an event mono-culinary is an excellent idea.

• Cheaper. Vegan / Veggie food is cheaper than meaty alternatives. A huge consideration when running a community event trying to cater for a few hundred people.
• Logistically easier. I've lost count of the number of events I've been to where organisers have misplaced the details of who has requested which meal, or where meat-eaters have accidentally polished off the food meant for veggies.
• Suitable for nearly all dietary preferences - vegetarian, Kosher, Halal, Hinduism, Buddhism. Means not having to quiz people on their ethical beliefs.
• Healthier. A typical hackathon just provides pizza and beer. That's fun, but not always the healthiest option available.

If you're planning on catering for a mass event, have a think about whether only providing vegan food will be a sensible and inclusive way to feed your attendees.

Here be dragons

Lots of people are psychologically addicted to meat. When you politely suggest they skip meat for a single meal, they have an extreme reaction. A huge amount of marketing money has been spent on associating meat with masculinity. This causes a form of castration-anxiety when people are "threatened" with a salad.

It's a little silly seeing grown adults tremble at the thought of vegetables, but that's the power of marketing!

That said, I was intrigued by the offer of a bunch of British delicacies delivered to my gaping mouth every month.

Kate

@katebevan

Replying to @edent@edent The idea is apparently that it's a surprise, tho choc, nice charcuterie, pickles etc. @AndyMW2602 is the man to ask.

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Andrew Murray-Watson

@AndyMW2602

Replying to @katebevan@katebevan @edent All top end yummy products, definitely chocolate in each box, charcuterie (or veggie alternative), sweets, jams, marmalades, etc etc

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So, what do you get for your twenty-five quid?

To start with, a big box full of straw!

Nestled under all that packaging: I'm a filthy hippy - so I got the veggie box. The meaty box has some different items.

First up, Chocolates By Eloise.

Handmade in Streatham, these are impressive chocs! The fig and orange was a subtle blend. The sour cherry had a much more intense flavour - although it overpowered the fennel.

Then, the spreadables.

A gorgeous spicy chutney from Rubies in the Rubble. Sweet flavour, and just the right amount of heat.

The sweet spreadable is from Butter Nut of London and is a "luxury sophisticated chocolate and hazelnut nut butter" - not Nutella, then! Good on toast, not too cloying.

Next up, biscuits!

From Stag Bakeries. The Seaweed Oatcakes were tasty - but I wouldn't have been able to tell that they had Hebridean Seaweed in them.

The cookies had too much sugar on them, and not enough chocolate inside them. Slightly underwhelming.

Verdict

Is the Guzzl box worth it? Totting up the cost of the items, plus postage, it looks bang on £25 to me. So you're not making great savings - but you are getting a range of interesting treats each month.

Every item in the box is something I probably would have bought if I was at a food fair. The quality is good and they're all items which aren't stocked in my local supermarket.

This isn't the same as a daily box like Graze - or even a weekly vegetable box - it is deliberately aimed at the "treat" end of the market

Discount

Get 50% off guzzl.club with code FRIEND50.

Being veggie in Beijing was relatively easy. I had a stock phrase "我吃素" (Wo Chi Su - I eat vegetables), and a smattering of tourist level Mandarin. I had recommendations from friends and - most importantly - I had the HappyCow app. An indispensable guide to veggie eating around the world.

Here we go!

VegeTiger - 素虎素餐

I was jetlagged and delirious with hunger on my first evening. I'd used the Beijing subway for the first time (so clean and efficient) and found myself wandering through the suburbs of the city. The directions just said "Find the KFC, then walk into the car park." Sure, how bad can this go?

Well, here's the KFC!

Here's the car park - with electric car charging points!

And here's SUHU VegeTiger!

Delightful pickles set out to start with - then a range of mock meat dishes

Staff were very friendly and were generous with my limited use of their language. Food was served quickly and with generous portions.

Dessert looked amazing, but I was too full.

vegetiger.com

Xin Shuang QuanSheng Tai LvYuan Restaurant

Not a strict vegetarian restaurant. It's where all the tour guides take their charges before heading up the Great Wall. As with most restaurants, the menus had large pictures.

My guide helpfully clarified which dishes were veggie friendly and which only had 有一点儿 (a little bit) of meat!

The salted duck eggs looked amazing in their blue shells. They were too salty for my tastes though. Great to try, but hard to stomach.

The garlic aubergine was drowned in garlic - just the way I like it!

The monk's vegetables were refreshing and had these strange yellow things which sort of tasted like potato? It wasn't sweetcorn - I know that!

Bowei Tang - 博味堂

OMG! We had a 20 minute wait for a table here. Almost unbearable given the smells coming out of the kitchen!

Bowei Tang served us up an incredible platter of veggie sashimi. All with fake fish.

Including this delight!

We also had some rather good "kung po" style fake chicken, and an assortment of veggie filled dumplings.

King's Joy

My good friend Sylvia recommended King's Joy and I am forever in her debt. A haute cuisine restaurant which serenaded us with a harpist and cellist. We had the cheapest tasting menu which worked out at around £70 each including drinks. That's pricey for Beijing, but such a treat!

The room was too "artfully" lit to get many photos - but here's a sample.

Dessert was so incredible - I had to take a video.

Wow! Dry ice (I think) to make the steam, a fruit dessert and two small cakes.

Wait staff were incredible, patiently explaining each dish and talking us through the history of the restaurant. Expensive, yes. But exquisite!

Fu Hui Ci Yuan Vegetarian Cultural Restaurant

This restaurant is down a back-alley off the highly commercial Wangfujing Street. It's part of a Buddhist museum and gift shop.

The tofu and mushroom sizzling bowl was fantastic - nourishing after a long day.

I found the rice to be too oily for my tastes - but it was redeemed by the steamed papaya and vegetables.

The wait staff were almost comically absent - but as I was the only one in after their lunch rush, I guess I can forgive them.

Ye Bo Zhai - 叶钵斋

The final restaurant of my tour. I found myself utterly exhausted and with only ¥70 left in my pocket. They were adamant that they wouldn't accept credit card. I chose their "Special Noodles with famous mushroom gravy" for ¥55.

It was... pretty good. Not amazing, but I was exhausted and broke. It filled me up enough to get back to my hotel. The decor was beautiful though.

It's all good!

I was too nervous (and rushed for time) to go for any street food - although I treated myself to a fair few ice-creams! The hotel I was staying at did a range of veggie dishes for breakfast, and the conference also catered to us meat-dodgers.

Beijing is a modern, cosmopolitan city. Staff in restaurants seemed more than happy to tolerate my poor grasp of their language.

I only scratched the surface of veggie friendly cuisine in Beijing. With a little planning, and bit of Google translate, it's easy to be vegetarian in Beiing. Pretty sure I need to go back to sample some more restaurants soon!

After last week's success with making solid apple juice, I thought I'd try my hand at "spherification". A way to make vegetarian caviar pearls.

The process should be simple enough. Mix your preferred flavouring with a sodium alginate solution. Then drip into a calcium chloride bath.

We tried soy sauce and sriracha (separately):

It started off well. The solutions dissolved properly, we mixed them, and then the disaster started. I just could not get spheres to drop out of the end of my syringe. We eventually ended up with a bowl full of "worms".

The soy sauce just turned into ghosts once they were dripped in. Dispersing and floating off like jellyfish. After a few minutes, we fished them out, dunked them in water, and plated them. The results weren't pretty.

A jelly-like goop. Fragile to the touch. Unappetizing to look at. The taste was good - I'll give it that. When scooped up onto the filo tarts, the flavour was as intense as if it had been drizzled directly from the bottle. The texture was, sadly, a bit slimy.

After much fuss, we did eventually manage a few spheres:

*sigh*

For reference, this is what it is supposed to look like!

What mistakes did I make?

• Didn't find a specific recipe for the ingredients I wanted.
• Made far too much. I should have started small rather than wasting a couple of bottles of sauce.
• Should have experimented with the pipette and syringe to see how to make droplets appear.

Luckily the ingredients were fairly cheap, and I only wasted a few hours.

Onwards!

Further reading about mistakes

• An Assistant Professor at Princeton published a CV of Failures
• GiveWell has a list of mistakes they've made while assessing charities
• The Granuaid's web team have an epic list of mistakes they made in 2016

Well, all good experiments start by buying a beginners' kit.

Before attempting basic "spherification", I decided to attempt something much more simple. Agar-Agar veggie strips.

• 400g Apple Juice
• 100g Caster Sugar
• 7g Agar-Agar Powder

The Agar-Agar needs to reach around 90℃ in order to fully dissolve. So mix the ingredients together in a pan and bring to the boil while whisking. Simmer for 3 minutes (keep whisking).

I then decanted the mixture into some plastic takeaway containers and left to cool. But the time it had reached room temperature, it was solid and easy to cut into strips.

It was much stiffer than jelly - and surprisingly brittle. It tasted great - the Agar leaves no flavour, so it was like eating solid apple juice. It paired perfectly with strong cheese.

Experiment #1 a complete success! But there's still room for improvement.

1. This was just regular apple juice from concentrate. I wonder if the acidity of freshly squeezed juice will negatively affect the process?
2. One fifth of this is sugar! Is that necessary?
3. I poured it quite thickly into the containers. Would a thinner layer be easier to roll and do something interesting with?
4. Flat sheets are booooooring! What other shapes would work?
5. Would savoury flavours work as well? Perhaps something spicy?

Onwards!

I'm not that person. So here's my middle-class experience of a food bank (by proxy).

Liz and I have recently moved to Oxford and - as part of the process of making new friends - are going to every community event we can manage. We've joined the local environmental group, been on a local litter pick, and attended our first DinnerTime

DinnerTime is a new form of community kitchen. The basic idea is simple.

• Get a large room.
• Supply cooking equipment.
• People bring food.
• People cook dinner for each other.

It's a great way to reduce waste, try new dishes, save money, and meet new people.

Some people bought tins from their cupboard, others fruit and veg that they'd grown. The organisers brought food from a local food bank. This immediately caused me to have an attack of middle class guilt. I don't need a food handout. Am I literally stealing food from the mouths of the hungry?

The organisers reassured us that this wasn't the case. All the food which we'd got was due to be destroyed that day. Most had hit its use-by date. Some - like the kale - was very grimy and quite hard to prepare unless you've experienced it before. Others - like the frozen garlic - just wasn't able to be made use of by the people who go to food banks.

So, along with the spices and herbs we'd provided, we started the mass cook! All of the cooking utensils and hot plates had been recycled - either donated, or rescued from the rubbish dump. There were about 30 of us in all, happily chatting, cooking, swapping recipes.

In a weird sort of way, it was like the Great British Bake Off - we'd been given ingredients and were told "impress each other". Let me tell you - it's hard to impress people with Kale! But there were risottos, curries, salads, fruit pies, and all sorts of other tasty treats by the end of the evening.

The meal was amazing! One of DinnerTime's policies is that all donations should be vegetarian - so I was able to munch on everything :-)

Some people had brought in dishes they'd made at home, there were a couple of bottles of wine (not from the food bank), and - surprisingly - everyone helped with the washing up!

After all the dishes were cleaned, we got some takeaway cartons and started scooping up leftovers for tomorrow's lunch. There was only one problem - there were still a lot of ingredients left. We were encouraged to take them home. That's when my other surge of guilt occurred. As I carried home a couple of kilos of wilting kale, some freezable garlic, and a half-dozen bits of assorted fruit (bruised, but good enough for a pie), I couldn't help but wonder if this was the best use of food.

Without a doubt, a whole group of us pooled resources and made use of food which couldn't otherwise be given away or used. And, in coming together, we were able to make dishes which we couldn't have done as individuals. Because I have a freezer which I can afford to run, and I have sufficiently well stocked cupboards with a range of ingredients, I can eke out more nutrition out of food which would otherwise have gone to waste.

I've been enjoying Jack Monroe's blog about how to cook on a budget. I wonder if one way to stretch a food budget is to encourage more community kitchens? Or even just cooking with neighbours? Of course, this relies on you knowing and liking your neighbours and ensuring that everyone contributes fairly. Surely it's cheaper to boil pasta for a group of five people than it is to boil five separate saucepans? No one wants to eat a whole head of lettuce that's nearing the end of its life, but it can be turned into a salad for a group to share.

It's not a permanent fix, and it doesn't address the underlying issues of food and energy poverty - but it is a great way to meet people, share food, and reduce your bills.

If you're interested in setting up a DinnerTime, you can download the DinnerTime Handbook for free.

Buy fresh wasabi in the UK. It's amazing

Fresh Wasabi? In The UK

When I was at university, I moved into a shared student home with Liz (spoiler she became my wife several years later!).

Liz was, and still is, quite the cook. However, her range of culinary equipment dumbfounded our house-mates. I once came in to the kitchen and witnessed a blazing row between her and someone who had the temerity to grate cheese in a nutmeg grater.

I didn't even know nutmeg graters existed!

I now know that, not only do they exist, they are especially poor at grating cheese.

This, of course, became a rich vein of comedy. Whenever Liz asked me to pass her a cheese grater, I would pass her the nutmeg grater! Hilarious! Ten years later and I'm still doing it.

It must be hell to live with me...

Anyway, a few years ago, I decided to buy Liz a present. Just one of those cheap "thinking of you" gifts which I periodically buy to remind her that I'm not a total dolt. I ended up in Muji and found, nestled among the kitchen tools, a wasabi grater.

(Technically, that's an Oroshigane)

Not only was it a funny gift - something new to pass her when she needed to grate Parmesan - but practical, too! All I needed to do was find an Asian supermarket which sold fresh wasabi. Easy, right?

Nope!

Turns out, nowhere outside of Japan sells wasabi. The wasabi paste we buy in this country is mostly horseradish and green food dye. The plants just don't travel well. Turning to Wikipedia....

Few places are suitable for large-scale wasabi cultivation, and cultivation is difficult even in ideal conditions.

So, for years the Oroshigane gathered dust at the bottom of a kitchen drawer. Occasionally seeing the light of day to tackle a particularly hard cheddar.

Until...

While flicking through the TV channels one morning, we happened upon some morning cookery show. The host started talking about wasabi.

"Hah!" said I, "They won't be using fresh stuff. It's impossible to get in this country."

The smarmy presenter looked into camera and said "We're using fresh wasabi which has been grown in Dorset."

WHAT!? Google google google check twitter google... AHA! The Fresh Wasabi Company. Selling UK grown wasabi. Click. Buy. Done!

Some £15 later, this arrived on our doorstep. A full rhizome of wasabi. Enough for 6 people, so the company reckons. At £2.50 per person, it's not the cheapest condiment in the world. But, what does it taste like?

Preparation

It's not quite as elaborate as a tea ceremony, but the wasabi has to be treated carefully. The instructions say it must be refrigerated as soon as it it delivered. (Ours spent the night in the sorting office and doesn't seem to be any the worse for it.)

The wasabi must be kept damp, wrapped in muslin, and stored in the fridge.

When needed, trim the end off, and scrape away the hard skin on the side. We used a standard potato peeler.

Then, grasp your Oroshigane and grind in a circular motion to create a fine paste. (Thanks to Kevin Anderson for the photos.)

Interestingly, the colour of the paste was a pale pink - rather than the luminous green that most fake wasabi is.

Finally, serve to friends with sushi.

The Taste Test

Even before the grinding, I could smell the wasabi's pungent flavour. Once the end was trimmed off our noses lit up. A simply heavenly scent.

Spread lightly on a veggie futomaki, the glistening pink paste looked oddly out of place. I guess I'm used to seeing bright green blobs.

But the taste... Oh! The taste! Words can't conjure up the magic of the flavour. Initially, it wasn't as aggressive as the pseudo-wasabi served by most restaurants. But it built in flavour and heat gradually. I didn't take enough to make my eyes water, but I could feel the potential behind it. The taste faded quickly, it didn't seem to linger much after swallowing.

Astonishing. A beautiful experience.

Is it worth it, though? Is it that much better than the shop-bought horseradish-and-preservatives pseudo-wasabi?

I suppose that it's the difference between serving Moët & Chandon and supermarket champagne. They both do the job of flavouring the sushi perfectly well - but if you care about food, you owe it to yourself to grind fresh wasabi at least one.

Buy fresh wasabi in the UK. It's amazing

I like a good curry. Damn. Even the word curry is a generic Britishism designed to cover any spicy food from lands afar.

Every Indian restaurant in the UK offers "The Most Authentic Cuisine". I know what I like - but I've no way to judge its authenticity.

One of our hosts asked where I wanted to go out for dinner last night. "There's this great Japanese place round the corner," he suggested.

I love Japanese food. But having flown a few thousand miles to India, why would I try any cuisine other than Indian?

The food here is beautiful. As a vegetarian, I'm overwhelmed with choice. With the exception of some ill-advised chutney, I've been able to handle the spiciness.

I've eaten in both cheap canteens and high class restaurants - the food, drink, and service has been uniformly impeccable.

But is it better than my local Ruby Murray? That's hard to say. There are some great restaurants in the UK. The only way to tell, really, is to have just one more spoonful of this paneer, and a quick bite of this dosa and - oh my! - another sip of this delightful mango lassi, and... and.. and...

This has been sent to Virgin Atlantic's complaints team.

Dear Sir, I realise that it's a standing joke to complain about the quality of airline food - but I wish to convey my distress at the vegetarian meals provided on the last two flights I took with you. On flight VS069 (27/12/2010) I had specifically requested a vegetarian meal. Hidden in the salad were prawns - something I did not realise until after I had taken a mouthful. I asked the cabin crew if they had any vegetarian alternatives and was told that they did not. On flight VS070 (03/01/2011) I had, again, specified my meal preferences in advance. Having now learned to be wary of Virgin's vegetarian meals, I was disappointed to note that the Caesar salad dressing contained anchovies. I'm not looking for compensation or thousands of Flying Club air miles. I just want you to show a little more respect to your vegetarian and vegan passengers. I don't expect gourmet food on an economy flight; I do expect my requested vegetarian meal to not contain meat, fish, poultry, or their derivatives. I spend a lot of time travelling for business and leisure. As much as I enjoy the Virgin Atlantic experience, this episode has rather put me off travelling with you again. Yours faithfully, Terence Eden

You choose your meal in a dimly lit bar then, guided by your blind waiter, you are lead through a series of curtains until you are ensconced in total and utter pitch black.

Choices are made from a set menu with no specifics other than vegetarian, meat, fish, or "exotic".  This is a unique culinary experience.  Relying only on smell, flavour and touch brings a whole new dimension to enjoying your food.

Going with a large group of people was an unnerving experience - never entirely sure of who was sat near you, or whose wine glass you were reaching for.  I can imagine this would be a delightful place for an intimate dinner - possibly even a first date - as you have to rely on conversation to keep your companions aware of your presence.

The waiters were very attentive - although you can call out to them at any time should the need arise.

The food was tremendous fun.  Like many expensive restaurants, portions were not overly generous but given the mix of flavours and characters on each plate, this is probably just as well.  Rather than assault the few remaining senses, the chefs have cooked up a subtle treat which relies on your total surprise from the moment your fork first enters your mouth.

The dessert was a potpourri of elegant flavours and mouth-pleasing textures.

There is no doubt that it is a dining experience like no other.

There are some downsides - the restaurant caters for a large number of people.  Due to the sensory deprivation, it seems that voices escalate and emotions are magnified.  A table of women regularly found themselves shrieking at their merest touch from a passer-by which lead to another table raising their voices to be heard.  The assault on the ears was quite tremendous and rather disconcerting.  Normally one can use all the senses to judge the mood in the room - without sight it seemed that the evening could descend in to chaos at any time.

Emerging blinking into the light is a blessed relief and as refreshing as any digestif. We eagerly crowded around picture books with large photos showing the meals we had just eaten.

I won't spoil the surprise by telling you what we had - the "White" menu was particularly inventive and the vegetarian menu was pleasingly different despite being revealed as a rather pedestrian offering.

At £34 for a two course meal and £39 for three courses, Dans Le Noir? is well within the reach of anyone who values creative dining.

TasteLondon Logo

There is a small problem with it, though.  The directory of restaurants it covers is a fairly heavy paperback book  Rather inconvenient to carry around on the off chance that you fancy popping out for some dinner .  They do have a rather good website - tastelondon.co.uk/ - but it doesn't work on mobile. Nope. Not even if you've got a Cadbury's iPhone.

Last year I asked TasteLondon if they were planning on developing a mobile site.  They said "yes" and here it is.  It's a textbook example of how not to design for mobile.  Let me take you through it.

Where is it?

How would you expect to get to the TasteLondon mobile site?  Their news page annouces the service but doesn't give the URL! The site is meant to auto-detect a mobile browser but failed to do so on BlackBerry or Android.

I tried guessing the URL.  Was it m.tastelondon.co.uk? Perhaps mobile.tastelondon.co.uk? Surely not wap.tastelondon.co.uk? I know tastelondon.mobi? Nope - none of those.  After much perseverance I discovered it was tastelondon.co.uk/iphone

Solutions

• TELL YOUR CUSTOMERS WHERE YOUR SITE IS!
• Mobile detection is hard.  You can use services like DeviceAtlas or WURFL to detect if a device is mobile.
• Always offer a link on your main page just in case your detection is wrong.
• If there are several standards, make sure you redirect your customers if they go to the wrong URL.  A simple redirect in .htaccess would have send everyone visiting the m.tastelondon URL to the correct location.
• Don't choose technology specific names in your addresses.  /iphone would indicate that you're not interested in the hundreds of millions of devices which aren't made by Apple.  While the iPhone is popular now - will it be in a year's time? Choose something vendor neutral.

So, here's the front page on my BlackBerry.

Front Page - KISS

I quite like this.  It's simple.  There's a link back to the full site.  The bold indicates that I'm in simple search and, if I want, I can go to Advanced Search.  I wouldn't have made "Simple Search" a link as I'm already here.  Overall, not bad.  Let's see what the search results are like.

JavaScript

So, I hit the button and what do I see?

JavaScript

Don't get me wrong, I love JavaScript. It does all sorts of amazing things and usually makes usability a lot better.  But on mobile?  True, many newer high-end phones have JavaScript - but literally billions don't.  Why would you alienate so many potential customers?

What makes it worse, is that this is a simple form.  We've had forms on the web since its inception.  It's a standard HTML element.  Why would a simple search box need JavaScript?

Is It Necessary?

• KISS
• If you're desperate to use a whizzy new feature - check how widely supported it is.  Make sure there's a fallback option for those users who won't or can't upgrade.
• Whenever you create a new service, test it as thoroughly as possible.  Remember, you are probably not your typical user.  Find out what technology your users have and design for them - not for what's "cool".

Ok, let me grab my Android handset and carry on testing...

Where am I?

So, I've just arrived at Waterloo Station when I see all the trains home are cancelled.  Let's grab a bite to eat nearby.  I'll search for Waterloo.

Searching near Waterloo

This is what I get back.

Results from searching for Waterloo

There are three serious errors with this page

1. The result is wrong.  I know the postcode of my home and my workplace.  I've no idea what the postcode is for anywhere else.  Given this is a London based service, I was expecting that a major train station would suffice.
2. No feedback on what I've searched for.  That search bar should be pre-populated with my search.  Just like every other search engine.  This gives allows me to correct any misspellings and serves as a reminder of what I was looking for.
3. Location.  The Prezzo in Peterborough is 265.31 Miles away.  Away from where?  I haven't given my location and, as far as I can tell, the site hasn't automatically detected it.  Where does this figure derive from?

User Needs

• Think about how the user thinks.  Does anyone know the postcode of the pub they're sat in?  If you need a street name for accuracy, tell the user.
• Give the user feedback.  Keep them in the loop.
• Detect the user's location.  This may be complicated for you - but it's easier for the user.

Success!

I'll try again.  I've got the feeling that I'm in the postal area of W2.  Here's what success looks like.

Is this as good as it can be?

A really good page.  Pretty, well formatted, lots of information.  Can you spot the four glaring usability issues?

1. I can't click on the phone numbers.  Some advanced phones will detect the number string and allow you dial it.  If not, you've got to find a scrap of paper, scribble down the number, close the browser, go to the phone's dialer and type the number in yourself.
2. Where is Craven Hill Gardens? Why not link to Google Maps. Or Yahoo Maps. Or any mapping service.
3. What do those icons mean?  Anyone already intimately familiar with the TasteLondon system may know what they mean.
4. Where do I go for more information?  The names of the venues aren't clickable.

Is This As Easy As It Could Be?

Make everything as easy as possible for your users.  In four simple steps the usability of this site could dramatically be increased.

1. Make phone numbers easy to dial.  Your user is on a phone, they need to book a restaurant, you've given them the number - why wouldn't you make it easy for them to call?  You can use WTAI or tel: to make it easy for any user to dial the number you've presented.
2. Maps.  On the desktop, users are quite happy to copy and paste text into another page or application.  It's not so easy on mobile. If something can be a link - it probably should be.
3. Familiarity. Because we spend all day in our jobs, we often forget that not everyone understands the acronyms and syntax we use.  Don't hide behind obscure icons unless you hyperlink those icons to a page describing what they mean.  Consider having a "key" or "legend" at the top of a jargon heavy page.
4. Have you given me enough information to make a decision?  Perhaps I want to see the menu, prices, review or some other information.  If the information is available on your main site, it should be available on mobile.  This is the central tenent of the One Web.

The Tyranny Of Choice

Let's pop into Advanced Search.  It's fairly comprehensive.

Advance search result

There's a sensible amount of options. Availability, Cost, and Offers all have 3 - 4 options.  Cuisine obviously has rather a lot of choices - 40 of them from African to Vietnamese. Yummy!

How many results do I want to see?  According to TasteLondon, it could be over 500!

How many results

Rational Choices

• Too many choices can be confusing and distressing for the user.
• How much information does a user want to see?
• How long will it take a user to download 500 results onto their phone?
• If you are going to offer a large results set, give the user a way to sort.
• Rationalise the choices you offer and how you offer them.  Is a list the best way? How about radio buttons or check boxes?

Sharing Is Caring

So, I've found the perfect restaurant for me and my friends.  I guess I'd better check that it's OK with them all.  How can I do that? I know! I'll SMS them the URL.

Ah... A problem.  The URL isn't specific to the restaurant.

The Site URL

Take Advantage of the Platform

• If you want people to visit your site, make it easy for them to share it with their friends.
• Consider having a "Send To Friend" button which will save your users the cost of a text message.
• Create useful URLs. Watch this presentation about URL design or read it direct from the mouths of experts - Cool URLs Don't Change.
• For this site, I'd use two different types of URLs.
• The URL for the search page should be similar to m.tastelondon.co.uk/?l=w2&c=veg&a=1&c=2&o=3 This enables your users to send the message "Hey, which one do you like the best?"
• The URL for each restaurant should be similar to m.tastelondon.co.uk/?r=1234 This enables your users to send the message "Hey, do you like this restaurant?"
• You can use "smsto://" on some phones to make it easier to send the URL by text.

Conclusion

I love my TasteLondon card.  It is tremendously valuable.  It has paid for itself many times over.  The mobile site is, frankly, a bit disappointing.  It works - on some phones.  It gives me information - but only the bare minimum.  It tries to be clever - but gets the basics wrong.

If I were dining on my own, didn't really care about the menu and hoped cabbies knew London as well as they're meant to - this wouldn't be a bad site.  I do use it - but find myself skipping into Google Maps and external restaurant review sites.  I have to copy and paste details or take a screenshot if I want to share information with friends.

TasteLondon's mobile site has only been live for a few weeks - I look forward to watching its evolution.

Miracle Berry Tablets purchased from Miracle Fruit International.