In Thailand you can get a perfectly decent Pad Thai and beer for a few hundred Baht. You can have an good pizza or freshly cooked burger for next to nothing. Food, in general, is cheap and cheerful. After a week of spring rolls and Tiger beer, we decided to treat ourselves to a fine-dining experience in the Michelin recognised Smokaccia Laboratory.

We opted for the nine-course(!) tasting menu - one regular and one vegan - with a pairing of both alcoholic and non-alcoholic drinks.

Let's get the cost out the way first - we paid around ฿16,000 (£380) and it was easily the best meal we've had anywhere in the world. The quality of the food even exceeded Gauthier Soho and the service was beyond that offered by the Chef's Table at The Savoy.

I'd like to walk you through the experience, so you can get a feel for why you should spend a ridiculous sum of money on several tiny portions.

As we entered the restaurant for our 18:00 reservation, we were greeted by name. It's a small thing, but it immediately made us feel warmly welcomed. There's was no awkward pause as a maître d' looked us up in a list, just a confirmation of our booking and dietary requirements, then an invitation to sit in the lounge.

Would we like a glass of Prosecco or sparkling non-alcoholic cocktail while we waited? But of course!

We were then presented with a cigar box each. As we opened them, smoke gently wafted out filling our noses with a delightful scent. Nestled inside was a small amuse-bouche - a perfect cracker topped with caviar. My vegan alternative had veggie-friendly caviar and was exquisite.

The waiters and sommelier all introduced themselves to us as they explained the food and how the evening would proceed. We were given flannels which were freshly sprayed with a signature scent to accompany the next course - and then we were ushered to meet the chef.

Luca Mascolo is a warm, funny, and gregarious host. He was eager to explain the concept of the restaurant and why each dish was created. He was passionate about ensuring that we had an amazing time and that the vegan food was equal in quality to the meat and fish dishes. Our first experience with his culinary madness was the "Campari bomb" - it literally exploded in my mouth and sent flavours dancing around my tongue. It is the first food that has actually made me giggle with childish delight.

This was swiftly followed by a tasting of the chef's tomato reduction. A perfect liquid appetiser.

We were guided to our table - we opted for the kitchen counter. There are several regular tables, but it was much more fun to be sat watching the magic of creation. Open-plan dining is nothing new, but the staff were so calm and synchronised that it felt like a meditative exercise watching them work in perfect unison.

The Smokaccia is the chef's signature focaccia. A fist-sized ball of bread, hard on the outside and impossibly pillowy on the inside. A sourdough creation of genius and perfect for soaking up the various oils and sauces served with the dishes.

What can be said about "An unusual event with Bertha"? I don't want to spoil the surprise so I'll just say this - I've never had a meal which made me laugh so much. Every moment - even reading the description - was pure joy. Why bother serving food in bowls when a ceramic egg-shell is much more fun! Almost as fun was watching it being served to other tables and seeing their reactions.

The truffle crunch was a little bite of ecstasy. This wasn't drenched in 2,4-dithiapentane - it was a perfect shaving of real truffle. To complement, I had the zero-waste potato dish. What kind of a chef thinks up potato ice-cream with red onion caramel? Again, either the chef or waiter came over to personally explain the order in which the dishes should be eaten and all the ingredients which went in to its construction.

Nearly all the food comes from Thailand - with the exception of the balsamic vinegar and wine (both from Italy) - so the food-miles are negligible. The basil and eggplant honestly tasted like they'd been plucked fresh from the dirt not five-minutes previously.

The vegan "foie gras" was next. Traditional foie gras is neither ethical nor sustainable, so this is made with local vegetables in an attempt to recreate the flavour and texture. It is described as containing a "blood explosion" and, as my spoon pierced the pineapple-glass, a pop of bright red "blood" spurted out! Again, a incredible moment of both food science, whimsy, and surprise.

It isn't just that every mouthful is delicious; the dining experience is pure theatre and filled with moments that make you gasp with delight. Such as the "fois gras" being served on a misty "lake" filled with pebbles and flowers, and then being presented with a "fortune cookie" from the goose.

There was a choice of "main" course although - as with any fine dining experience - it was barely more than a few bites. But what a few bites! Writing this, it seems silly to be so in love with a carrot but I don't care! I loved every nibble of that carrot mixed with kombucha and wasabi leaf. I grinned like a lunatic when the kombu/soy caviar pearls burst on my tongue.

A morsel of the most intense melon sorbet topped with bunt radicchio was the perfect end to the meal. A simple and fun palate cleanser. Of course there were further surprises in store!

There was a choice of desserts and both were vegan! Liz and I decided to get one each. I'm fairly sure that the impossible pistachio ice-cream was my favourite, but the dark chocolate and hazelnut was so precisely targetted to my taste-buds that I'd have to try them both again to make sure.

I wish I could remember all the tea options. Liz had the Tom Kah and I went for the ginger and honey. A little moment of calm in an over-exciting evening. We watched the chefs prepare dishes for the now-bustling restaurant.

It is amazing how full you can feel after eating just a few bites over two-and-a-half hours. I suspect the 18 course menu would have been overwhelming. How we found room for the petit fours I can't possibly imagine.

I do know how I found room for the liquid nitrogen "cooked" coconut though - humans have a separate ice-cream stomach. That's just science. Also, I've never had fermented watermelon rind before and I can't understand how my life has been complete without it.

Chef Mascolo kept making sure that we were satisfied, he was happy to chat about the processes behind the food and why he is so keen to bring a high-quality dining experience to Phuket. His home-brewed limoncello was far removed from the thick and sickly syrup which is usually proffered at the end of an Italian meal. This was a thin, light, and highly spiced twist on the classic. A perfect end to a perfect meal.

Of course, the restaurant still had some surprises for us - including a rather touching "thank you" and a cute little gift-bag to send us on our way. We were exhausted from smiling and laughing so much. Every single bite made us incredibly happy. Fine dining can be a serious and solemn experience - this felt like being in the playground of a mad professor who just wants to have fun with your taste-buds and your heart.

I'm not saying that you should stop what you're doing right now, fly to Phuket, and have the best meal of your life. I'm merely saying that if you value inventive food, prepared by a team of experts with an obsessive eye for detail, presided over by a man who obviously values creating an inclusive and joyful experience - then you should reserve a table now.

The Smokaccia isn't merely a food laboratory - it is a happiness laboratory.

People told me that it was impossible to be veggie in Japan. That was nonsense. I wouldn't say it was easy, but it was possible with a little bit of planning.

First, the good news! I found loads of fully veggie restaurants in Tokyo, Kyoto, Nara, Osaka, and Hiroshima. If you and your travelling companions are happy to be veggie all the time, you'll be fine.

All the larger convenience stores had some veggie options. Usually cut vegetables, or potato crisps, or egg-salad sandwiches. Some of them had tofu sushi and the like.

You aren't going to be able to wander into any random restaurant and get a veggie feast (although you'll probably find edamame everywhere!) but you can find omni-places which do decent veggie-friendly fare. Even street-food markets usually had at least one suitable offering. I had flame-grilled bamboo, tornado potatoes, local cakes, and a few other tasty treats as we strolled along. Google Translate goes a long way if you want to make certain.

Now the bad news. How much plausible deniability do you want in your life? Almost nothing in supermarkets or restaurants has the ⓥ symbol or similar on it. In Europe you'll find it everywhere, here you'll have to point your phone at the menu and trust the AI to translate correctly.

Bonito (fish-flakes) is everywhere. It is added as flavouring much like the West adds salt and sugar. It often goes unlabelled. Even at a restaurant specialising in tofu, I was served a little dish of bonito - thankfully on the side. It's up to you how much you care about this. I took the pragmatic decision that if there weren't great big lumps of flesh in my food then I was going to let it slide.

I ordered the special Vegan Ramen in one place. It was made with a different soup base to the meaty one (as confirmed by my omniwife) but it did also have a boiled egg in it!

As I've mentioned before, there are no Vegan Morality Police. You can be as flexible as you like with your diet and you won't be sent to hell. Which is lucky, because you might need a fair bit of flexibility in Japan!

There are various campaigns in Japan to raise awareness of veggie issues - including better labelling of food. But, for now, you may have to go with the flow.

A few apps make things easier:

• Google Translate is good - but not flawless.
• Payke is a shopping app with a built in barcode scanner. Zap something in a shop and it will probably tell you the ingredients in English. The app - like many in Japan - isn't attuned to Western ideas of usability, but it mostly works.
• HappyCow is essential. It lists veggie restaurants and omni restaurants with a decent selection of suitable food.
• Google Maps was adequate - but check the results carefully.
• Tabelog lists every restaurant in Japan and has lots of reviews from locals - I couldn't find an easy way to show only veggie-friendly places though.

There are no shortage of decent veggie places. Some are Izakaya bars with touch-screen menus mostly translated into English. Others are fine-dining with a set multi-course tasting menu. You'll find veggie versions of all the classic Japanese dishes - or burger & chips if that's what you want.

And here's some tips that I picked up along the way:

• There are lots of Italian restaurants in Japan. You can usually find a few veggie dishes in those.
• Similarly, Indian restaurants always have an aloo-gobi or similar if you fancy a curry.
• Hotel breakfasts are usually well-labelled. All the ones I went to explicitly said if food had meat or fish in it. If all else fails, a bowl of rice and pickles will fill you up!
• The chain "Mos Burger" has a couple of plant-based "green" burgers on its menus. They were pretty good!
• Lots of the veg-only places we went to were full of tourists. You may not get the "authentic local" experience if you stick to just those sorts of restaurants.
• Have a few beers or a couple of glasses of Sake if you think you accidentally ate something you'd rather not have.

Here are a few photos and reviews of some of the places I enjoyed - you can read more on my HappyCow profile.

A Vegan Walks Into A Steak Restaurant...

One of the best vegan meals I had in Japan was at - of all places - a Halal Kobe Beef restaurant! They specialise in eye-wateringly expensive cuts of meat. But they also had a vegan set menu which was exquisite.

A perfect vegan miso, with a sesame salad, followed by tofu and vegetables grilled in front of me. A half-dozen mock-meat gyoza with various dipping sauces. Then garlic rice which blew my nose away.

Located in the very touristy Dotonbori district, it was quiet at lunch but I recommending booking in advance. A spectacular meal with a very friendly chef.

Ramen

There is a chain of ramen restaurants called Ramen Kiou. Like lots of fast-ish food places in Japan, you order using a touch-screen at the table. This chain has a helpful screen describing their vegan policy:

There were several veggie options and, as it is an open kitchen, you can watch the chefs work.

What's better than one vegan gyoza?

Eleven vegan gyoza!

The aptly-named Vegan Gyoza restaurant in Tokyo served us up a selection of their steamed bundles of happiness. Each was a distinct flavour and each was a unique colour. Splendid!

So Good We Went There Twice

I don't usually revisit restaurants while on holiday - but Nezu Noya was so good we made an exception!

Hidden inside a health-food store, it's a small restaurant so you may need to wait if you haven't booked.

The chopstick holders were delightful seashells. I assume even the most ardent vegan wouldn't consider that problematic 😄

Too Much Tofu

We wandered around the bamboo forests north of Kyoto and were suddenly overtaken by an all-consuming need to eat tofu. We found ourselves at Yudofu Sagano - they are a restaurant set in beautiful gardens, with several cosy rooms inside. We sat on the floor (!) while we were served a ten-course tofu lunch.

Here's a small selection of what we had.

There was a simmering pot of tofu in the centre, and then a plethora of of other styles. In all honesty, it was too much - but in an excellent way! Each dish was explained to us, which allowed me to avoid the fish-flakes (served on the side).

Beer and Grub

An Izakaya is a sort of bar which which does food. Again, you tap on an onscreen menu or scan a QR code to order. Then food and drink appears at your table.

We found a Vegan Izakaya in Kyoto which had space for us - which was lucky as it was pretty full.

They had a KFC-style coating on their mushrooms which was excellent - and a decent range of beer.

Naramachi Vegan Nabi ならまちヴィーガン菜美

No trip to Japan is complete without visiting Nara, and no visit to Nara is complete without visiting Vegan Nabi!

This is a cat themed restaurant. There are no cats wandering around. Gorgeously decorated with lots of cat-based artwork and jewellery to buy. The food is outstanding. Fresh and obviously made with love.

The green blob by the soy sauce is not wasabi - it is super strength yuzu pickle.

And more...

If you're vegetarian or vegan, you can find plenty of options in major cities. We had no trouble eating at veggie-friendly restaurants in Tokyo, Kyoto, Osaka, Nara, and Hiroshima. You may need to be a little flexible about what you consider veggie - but should be able to enjoy a delicious range of food.

I packed a bunch of snack bars, stocked up Google translate with suitable phrases, and resigned myself to having to pick the ham out of a salad while my wife dined on local specialities. Ah well, I can survive on bread and olives, I guess.

As it happens, I was wrong. Totally and utterly wrong. From Bratislava to Zagreb, I had my fill of tasty veggie treats without fuss. Even the trains weren't too bad.

Here's a quick run-down of what worked and what went (slightly) awry. Or skip to the photos.

On-Train Dining

This was the most variable experience.

The Deutsche Bahn trains had an web site which let you order to your seat! I tried the vegan currywurst which was excellent for train-food. Similarly, the tofu-curry was better than I expected, and was washed down with a lovely radler.

Some of the Czech trains had a selection of sandwiches and salads which were veggie and vegan.

Breakfast on the sleepers was pastry (with dairy) and some fruit. The train from Germany to Paris had a single vegan dish - grated carrot!

The Eurostar back to the UK served up a perfectly fine salad, with yoghurt on the side. They were very good at getting me some non-dairy spread for my bread.

Some trains had no dining car, or only took cash, or nothing veggie. So it is always worth stocking up before travelling. Which leads me on to…

Supermarkets

While other countries don't have the same pre-packed sandwich culture as the UK, you can always find crisps, snack bars, instant noodles, and - sometimes - pre-packed salads.

The Ⓥ symbol is pretty universal - but it's handy to know what the local word is for "Milk". Across Europe, labelling rules are pretty strict, which is good because…

Allergens

The EU has a list of common food allergens. I think nearly every restaurant menu we saw had prominent labelling under each dish. Even if you can't translate exactly what you're eating, it is easy to spot a dish with dairy, eggs, etc.

Say, how do you find good restaurants to eat at?

Happy Cow to the Rescue!

I've spent 12 very happy years using Happy Cow - it list restaurants which are either pure veggie, or have decent veggie options. So before getting to a city, we found restaurants that looked promising.

In fairness, nearly every restaurant we passed had at least something vegetarian on the menu. Usually something cheesey or a side dish of vegetables. But Happy Cow showed us restaurants which had a good selection of omni dishes and veggie dishes. As Liz is an omni, we ate at a mix of places and, to be honest, some of the mixed restaurants were better than the veggie only ones!

You can read all my reviews on my profile.

Local Cuisine

It's no fun going to a brand new European country and only eating veggie sushi and Quorn sausages. Thankfully, we had a great range of local cuisine done in the veggie style.

In Frankfurt I had a vegan Sausage with cabbage salad and home fried potatoes, paired with some lovely apfelwein. I had various simulacrums of local dumplings in sauce, the traditional sandwich with a veggie twist, and the world famous cake make without dairy. Lush!

Of course, it isn't all local dishes for local people. We also went to a very strange influencer restaurant in Slovenia who were happy to chat about which dishes were suitable.

Cultural Hegemony

Despite Brexit, English is still widely spoken. When we tried speaking in the local language we were immediately handed an English menu! And, on the few occasions that didn't happen, Google Translate is basically magic.

Lots of the dishes may be strange to you. That's OK, it is all part of the adventure. But, if you do freak out…

In An Emergency

In every city in Europe, I guarantee you'll find one of the following:

• A falafel stand which claims to cook the only authentic falafel in town.
• A Chinese takeaway with an excellent selection of tofu dishes.
• An Indian restaurant who can do a range of "pure vegetarian" meals.
• A big chain fast-food place,

Luckily, I didn't have to resort to a veggie whopper or a KFC vegetable wrap, but it was nice to know I could fall back on them if needed.

Where it went wrong

There were only a few hiccoughs. Some of the restaurants had slow service or rude staff - but you get that in any restaurant.

One veggie place we went to served the worst vegan schnitzel I've ever tried. Tasted like flattened cardboard coated with crumbled disappointment.

I was pretty sure one of the packet of crisps I bought was milk free, but on closer inspection I was mistaken. Off to vegan jail for me!

Should I Do This?

Yes! If you follow a veggie or vegan diet, Europe is very accommodating. We found kebab shops which only did plant-based dishes, high class restaurants with a couple of incredibly inventive dishes, and everything in between.

Sure, the options on trains can be a bit dicey sometimes, and there's always the suspicion that the waiter has mistaken your order, but it is basically fine.

Nearly every restaurant has a website where you can check the menu in advance, and most of them support online reservations.

Honestly, there's never been a better time to be a veggie in Europe.

Photos

Please enjoy these various shots of delicious food from across Europe.

So we fall back on the wisdom of the ancients. If you are religious, you have a fairly clear text-book which says what you are not allowed to eat. There are hundreds of commentaries by learned men⁰ concerning all the edge cases. If you make a mistake, you can speak to a religious leader for absolution.

Non-religious dietary preferences don't have that backstop.

Let's say that you've decided to go vegan. What is and isn't vegan? Who decides on that?

In the UK, the Vegan Society has a complex history. It is, at best, an advocacy group rather than the final arbiter of veganism. They cannot expel you from being vegan. They cannot whip you in the town square if you eat honey¹. You cannot beg them for forgiveness if you accidentally eat seven cheeseburgers².

This trips up a lot of new veggies. If they transgress, they jump onto forums and group chats showing remorse and being utterly distraught. This is a calamity! They've accidentally broken the rules and need either punishment or a way to make amends. Forgive me Greenfather, for I have sinned.

To which the older and more seasoned³ meat-dodgers look on with benevolent bemusement. There is no one available to forgive you other than yourself. The only absolution is to try a little harder next time. No one will ostracise you; there's nothing to be ostracised from.

Is eating "meat shaped" things OK? That's up to you, chief!

Should I throw out the leather jacket I got before I switched? Your choice, pal!

Can I say a prayer to rid me of the temptation of a 2am kebab? If you want to, bossman!

The problem is, that's hard. Continually making decisions is cognitively taxing. That's why we gravitate to morality systems like religion, the Free Software Foundation, and CAMRA. The issues have been thrashed out over decades, there are simple to follow guides, we can outsource our thinking to responsible adults.

To be clear, I'm not the Vegan Morality Police. I don't care what you do or don't eat. Enjoy that fricassée of dolphin if you want. There's no vengeful vegan god who will deny you entry into vegan heaven⁴.

Elective morality systems which aren't enforced by social or physical violence are rare. Our delicious meaty brains aren't used to them.

There are lots of companies which will sell you a pre-designed package Interrailing tour - but we decided to tread our own path. We spent a few weeks poring over maps and rail planners, scouring booking.com for hotels, and working out where we would stop for laundry!

This is a practical look at our itinerary, how we booked the journeys, and the travel snags we faced. If you think you can do better, please write your own blog post.

London to Amsterdam

The Eurostar itself is the most civilised way to travel. Get on train in city centre, a few hours later get off train in a foreign city centre.

The pre-travel experience isn't great. St Pancras is, sadly, dangerously overcrowded. Tried to get into the Premium lounge but even with 1st class tickets we were rebuffed. We also had the wrong sort of Amex for access.

Also annoyingly, there are only limited 1st class seats available for Interrail passengers. So our choice was 1st class with a change in Brussels or standard direct. We went direct so we didn't have to faff with a change. The seating in modern Eurostar trains is fairly spacious.

Amsterdam to The Hague & Back

The Interrail app made this simple. Go to the journey planner, pick a train, add it to your journey.

The massive Aztec Code opened the gates, and we strolled on to a train and sat upstairs. The return was just as simple.

Amsterdam to Frankfurt

Our first attempt at buying reservations. Annoyingly, the Interrail app punts you out to their website. Even more annoyingly, they cheekily add a booking fee - we found out later that DB's website (which has an English version) is fee free.

There's also no ability to select your seats with the Interrail website.

Again, a painless journey. The vegan currywurst was more than adequate for train food. The police passed through the train at one point checking passports - so useful to keep your papers close to hand.

WiFi was free and had a bunch of entertainment services if you get bored of looking out the window.

Frankfurt to Zurich

Frankfurt station has a 1st class lounge - but not for Interrail passengers. Thankfully the main station has plenty of seating.

The night before departure, the Interrail app said seat reservations weren't necessary, but the DB website recommended them. Reservations were easy in the DB site and it let us pick our seats - only 6 were showing as available. We got on and the train was packed, so it was certainly worth the few Euro for a reservation.

No police checks but, on departing Basel's Swiss station, the guard checked passports.

Zurich to Brugg & back

A quick hop over to visit a castle. No barrier checks at Zurich's station. It is quite large, so worth leaving a few extra minutes to walk all the way down to the platforms.

Incredibly roomy 1st class on the upper deck.

We walked all the way to a minor station, hopped on a train back to the city.

After walking for an hour to a little bar where we met some friends, we found another little station to take us home. We didn't even have time to climb the stairs before we were back!

Zurich Cruise

The various benefits of the Interrail ticket aren't always obvious. We went on a lake cruise and were pleasantly surprised to discover that we got 50% off the 1st class tickets. We sat in the sunshine and took in the surrounding glamour.

Zurich to Prague Sleeper

This was one of our anchor journeys. 10 weeks before departure, we booked a private sleeper compartment.

We arrived at the station an hour early and had a slightly nervous wait for the train to appear on the departure board. Confusingly, there were two sleepers listed in the app, with subtly different routes but the same departure and arrival times.

Turns out, the train splits, with half going to Prague and the rest elsewhere. The train arrived about 15 minutes before departure, which was a little unnerving!

The private carriage had four free bottles of mineral water and some slippers, which was a nice touch.

Beer and wine was available to buy. There was a vegetarian breakfast, but nothing vegan other than a bread roll and a bottle of fruit juice.

Sleep was possible, although the starting and stopping of the train is quite disturbing.

No border checks. So we stepped off into the city centre.

Prague Public Transport

We paid about £11 for unlimited trams, buses, and metro for 3 days. Well worth it!

Prague to Bratislava

Annoyingly the Interrail app doesn't let you select seats, so it is always a hop off to the provider's website to select from a seating map. I wouldn't mind, but Interrail have the temerity to charge an inflated price for seat reservations plus a booking fee.

I found it was cheapest to book reservations directly on https://CD.cz - note that they have shitty customer service for when things go wrong.

For example, our 1st class carriage was cancelled! We received an email after we had boarded changing us to 2nd class. Not ideal but we eventually battled through the crowds to get to our seats. Well, somewhere close to our seats.

No border inspection, but the ticket checker wanted to make sure our IDs matched our tickets.

WiFi was a bit rubbish, kept disappearing, but I was eventually able to submit a refund request for our seat reservations.

Bratislava to Budapest

A 10 minute delay in departure led to a 20 minute delay in arrival, but the 1st class carriage was available. We each got a free bottle of water. No toilet paper or hand driers in the loos. No passport checks at the border.

Budapest Public Transport

An utter failure! Despite the machine being in English, we just couldn't work out how to buy a single bus ticket. So we walked.

Budapest to Vienna

Slightly confusingly there are multiple stations which go to Vienna. Neither of which were the station we arrived at!

The Interrail app, once again, wouldn't let us book seat reservations - so I registered for yet another train provider's website.

Keleti station has a 1st class lounge. Basic drinks and snacks available - although the only vegan food was pistachios 😆

The lounge was right next to the Vienna train's platform, which made for a relaxing wait.

At seat dining service, although the web-based ordering system was a bit slow. Had a surprisingly decent tofu curry and beer.

No passport checks and only 5 minutes late.

Vienna Public Transport

Very easy to buy a 24 hour pass - all the machines spoke English. Tickets were pre-validated so we could jump on and off throughout our stay.

Vienna to Graz

The OBB lounge is available to 1st class Interrail holders. So a relaxing wait for the train. Some snacks and drinks available.

Departed and arrived on time. Only thing of note was that a couple of the toilets were out of order.

Graz to Ljubljana

Graz station also has a 1st class lounge. Our Interrail tickets didn't work on the automatic scanner, but the ÖBB agent took pity on us and opened the door. Plenty of snacks and drinks available.

One of the few journeys where we couldn't choose our seats when reserving. As a result, we were assigned to seats at opposite ends of the only 1st class carriage. Luckily, it wasn't very full so we grabbed two free seats next to each other.

No WiFi on the train, which was odd. That said, the quality of WiFi has been highly variable on these journeys.

The dining car was cute but cash only. The only vegan thing on the menu was a salad.

Train was old and rickety, came in a few minutes late.

Long wait at the border and a couple of ticket checks - but no passport inspection.

Ljubljana to Zagreb

Train arrived on time, but no 1st class compartments. A fair few disgruntled Interraillers. No WiFi on the fairly decrepit train. But the 2nd class carriage had little compartments of 6 seats, so it wasn't too bad.

No power sockets, so glad I had my big battery with me. No air con, although the windows could be dragged open. No food or drink that I could see either. Primitive toilets.

Tickets were checked once we were over the border, but no passport control.

Czech railways, who sold us the 1st class reservation, refused a refund because we couldn't prove there was no 1st class! They refused to check with the train operator. So I filed a credit card dispute.

Zagreb Public Transport

Like other cities, there's a 24 and 72 hour pass for unlimited rides. We got the Zagreb Card which also came with entry to a bunch of museums.

Trams were plentiful. No need to show your ticket unless an inspector appears. Stops were announced in Croatian and English. Some trams were clean and modern, others ancient and filthy.

Zagreb to Stuttgart Sleeper

Another "tent-pole" journey booked weeks in advance. We managed to get a private berth for two - but without a toilet / washing facilities.

Zagreb station has left-luggage lockers which were big enough for our massive packs.

Train arrived 40 minutes early. Unfortunately, there was a problem without our coach so, after much shunting, a new one was procured. Rather than a 2 person berth, we got a 6 person couchette - albeit all to ourselves.

No WiFi, but plenty of phone signal along the line. One toilet didn't have soap, the other had no paper. Choose wisely!

At 0415 we crossed the border to Germany. Whereupon the police boarded, knocked loudly on our door, and demanded to see our passports.

I'll be honest, it wasn't the best quality sleep I've ever had! Breakfast was a pre-packaged chocolate croissant. No vegan option, but we did get some bottled water.

Given the reservation was over €200, we were somewhat underwhelmed!

Stuttgart Public Transport

Find a machine at the U-Bahn, select English, pay a few € for a day pass. As with every other country there are no ticket barriers and you don't have to present your ticket to the driver.

Stuttgart to Ludwigsburg & back

Cheeky little day-trip on our last full day. Trains every 10 minutes. 1st class available on the way out, but not the way back. But, for a 13 minute journey on a clean and modern train, it was hardly noticeable.

Stuttgart to Paris

The trip I'd been dreading. Given Deutsche Bahn's reputation for poor timekeeping, I was worried we'd miss our connection in Paris.

We reserved the seats before we started the whole adventure as Interrail said they were selling quickly. Fair enough for a peak time morning service and, indeed, the train was crammed.

The TGV 9576 was a bit shabby. Even in 1st class some seats were torn and there were mystery stains on the ceiling. The luggage rack had just about enough space for everyone's bags.

The Interrail app was pretty good at keeping us informed of the likely arrival times. Although it thought the train would arrive late into Stuttgart instead it came early and departed on time. It also said there could be mandatory bag inspections and to allow an extra 20 minutes for boarding. That didn't happen though; we just strolled straight on.

On train WiFi worked once the train departed. There were some locally hosted podcasts, movies, train information, and food ordering.

Literally the only vegan option was grated carrot. Bienvenue en France!

Some of the toilets had no paper so, just like China, remember to carry your own!

Paris to London

Much like the journey out, this was booked months in advance. That allowed us to get first class seats for the journey back.

A quick walk in the rain from Garre L'Est to Nord. The standard route takes you up a flight of stairs, which isn't ideal with luggage. The walkway between the stations isn’t yet complete. Luckily there is an alternative route.

The Eurostar terminal only lets you in 2 hours before departure. The lounge is only for Premier Mega Extra Special customers, so we sat in the main station.

Once on the train the "Plus" seats aren't noticeably more comfortable than the standard seats although they are a bit larger.

Departure was on time. As we were travelling in "Plus", we got a complimentary meal. There wasn't a vegan option, so I spooned the yogurt off my salad bowl. The cabin crew found me some margarine for my bread. Wine was nice!

Train arrived perfectly on time. But disembarking was delayed because of another train on the opposite platform.

Statistics

The Interrail Android app has a nifty little summary of all the journeys you've taken. I'm not sure if that time accounts for delays (probably not) - but the rest seems accurate.

123V is the literal opposite of that.

Flavours so enticing that the soy sauce and wasabi almost felt redundant. A panoply of delights, presented with care and served with a flourish.

We went for the お任せ (Omasake) - which means the chef chose 20 pieces of sushi for us. We had a 241 deal, so got that twice. Is forty sushi too much sushi? Almost!

At £35 a head, the tasting menu is cheaper than a starter and main at most central London restaurants. It isn't cheap but is is exquisite.

Every bite brought new flavours. I'd previously tried cooking some of the synthetic tuna replacement myself, but here it is done properly. Perfect texture, subtle flavours, and beautifully wrapped.

There's a small cocktail menu - with an inventive non-alcoholic list.

I had just enough room for a dessert - the sorbet sampler. Again, lush flavours delicately balanced.

The garden seating outside (covered and with heaters) was delightful on a crisp autumn evening. Weirdly, the toilets are through a boutique shop and down a flight of stairs.

With the deal, a meal for two, plus cocktails, wine, and a well-deserved tip, came to £90.

It looks like this:

Thick and juicy plant-based protein (available in "Smoked Haddock" or "Cod" flavours), wrapped in a sheet of seaweed, and coated in thick and crunchy batter. Delicious! The flavour was more intense than the normal sort of Quorn fish-style fingers, chips were as good as any I've had elsewhere, the tartare sauce and aioli were nice - although perhaps a bit cheeky to charge extra for them.

The restaurant is down a steep flight of stairs, but they also do delivery and take-away. There's a few seats available, as well as customer loos.

We couldn't finish all our chips, but the staff were happy to give us a takeaway box. So we munched them on the way home - in the rain.

Let's get one thing out of the way first. I am not a doctor. I don't even play one on TV. This blog post is not medical advice.

A few years ago I was suffering from some gastric issues. The doctors had tried several things - including a colonoscopy - but found nothing. At the start of the pandemic, when it was impossible to get a GP appointment, I decided to try cutting out dairy. And that basically solved a lot of issues. Turns out, I may have age-onset Lactose Intolerance⁰.

Adjusting to it hasn't been so hard. I was already vegetarian, so switching to being mostly vegan¹ was pretty simple. But I miss proper cheese.

I occasionally take a Lactayse supplement if I know I can't avoid dairy. But that's a bit of a faff. And scientists haven't figured out how to permanently cure Lactose Intolerance yet² - they're too busy trying to cure cancer. Which is reasonable, I suppose.

And then I discovered Manzo Pharmaceuticals Lacto-Freedom. It's a 1 week course of probiotics which claims to give you several months worth of lactase-producing enzymes. Basically re-colonising your colon to allow you not to shit yourself every time you accidentally look lovingly at a slice of cheese.

Total cost including shipping from the USA was about £40. Pricey for a small bottle of pills. But, crucially, do they work?

The experiment

In order to do a proper test, I decided to experiment on myself. I ate some dairy-cheese, a couple of spoonfuls of yoghurt, and washed it down with half-a-pint of semi-skimmed.

The results were... look, do you want the gory details? There was sound, fury, spasms, bloating and - by the next day - I was literally a kilogram lighter³. So I think it's fairly safe to say that milk doesn't agree with me!

Treatment

The probiotics have to be taken on an empty stomach. Either an hour before eating or two hours after. Three times per day. No alcohol consumption - lest you sterilise the little buggers. And, obviously, no antibiotics.

The pills aren't large:

21 of those over a week. Then leave it another week to settle down. Then you should be able to consume dairy with impunity⁴.

The result

Like any probiotic, they can bubble up inside your guts. The pack came with a warning that they might cause stomach cramps. For the first couple of days of taking them, I was much more flatulent than usual⁵. It took a few days for things to calm down⁶.

I took all 21 over a week. Waited a few days. Then poured cow's milk all over my cereal. And...

…Nothing. My stomach gave a few little rumbles throughout the day. But I never experienced that it's happening feeling which will be common to so many of my LI friends. The little critters in my intestines chomped away on the lactose. I felt a little bloated, but nothing like I usually do.

I didn't go overboard with dairy⁷ over the next few days. A scrap of cheese, milk on my cereal, the occasional snaffle of chocolate. It all seemed to go just fine.

The "protection" is supposed to last for around 3 months. Is £160 per year a good deal in order to feel confident that you're not going to have an embarrassing moment if you accidentally eat an entire Edam? You tell me.

How does it work?

SCIENCE! A per their patent, they genetically engineered L. acidophilus MPH734. They tested its effectiveness on rats and humans.

But, it's important to note the disclaimer on their website:

These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.

There is a clinical trial record - but no results have been published.

Should I take it?

I am not a doctor. I cannot give medical advice. I am not being paid to promote these. The pills haven't been officially tested in the UK, as far as I know.

But, reporting on this study of one person, these seem to work. I haven't tried stuffing my face with a thousand kilos of cheese - that's probably enough to overwhelm anyone's guts. But for managing the odd pizza, or cheese on crackers, or a packet of crisps inexplicably bulked up with milk powder - it's pretty good!

With that, she swept off with our cocktail orders.

Unity Diner is a lovely vegan diner near Brick Lane. It has kitschy booths, funky cocktails, and a menu stacked with vegan burgers, shrimp, poutine, and - now - Redefine Meat's 3D printed synthetic meat.

Their products aren't available in UK shops yet - they seem to be launching through steakhouses, restaurants, and hotels. It's important to note that this is a plant-based product; it isn't Synthetarian lab-grown bio-flesh. Rather than a uniform slab of protein like a Quorn steak, this is built to mimic the variable texture of cow muscle.

After a plate of garlic "prawns" (the same as you'd find in any vegan Chinese wholesaler) and two excellent cocktails, I received a big plate of steak, chips, and peas. Excuse the dimly lit photo:

I've not eaten a steak for close to quarter of a century. So I was curious what I'd make of it.

The texture when cutting in to it was incredible. A tough exterior - unlike the usual faux-steaks, I really could have done with a steak knife! The internals looked... stringy? Again, completely different to the usual consistency of any veggie-burger I'd had before. The insides were vaguely pink - a bit like the "Moving Mountains" burgers with their fake blood made of beetroot.

All of which leads to an incredible mouthfeel. The outside was seared and chewy, the inside tender and flaky. My carnivorous companion thought it to be closer to salt-beef than steak.

And the taste? Again, I've been a salad-muncher for half my life; don't ask me how it compare to real meat. But it was... nice. It had a good balance of salt and fat. There was no gristle, it wasn't overly spiced or burnt. Just a good solid bit of flavour. Of course, when covered with diane sauce it was indistinguishable from the real deal.

So, as a chunk of salt-beef drowned in sauce, it was pretty good.

Would I eat it again? That's a tough one. I didn't experience the transcendence that the waitress warned me about. It didn't freak me out to eat something with a similar taste and texture to meat. It was delicious. But, at the same time, it was only steak and chips. That's the kind of thing I associate with someone who doesn't want to try anything more adventurous than what they were force-fed for school dinners. The chips were fine. The peas were peas. It was a fascinating experience for what was, ultimately, a fairly dull meal.

If I were at a steak-house with my meat-eater friends, I'd probably order it rather than a disappointing mushroom risotto. But, in a veggie restaurant, I think I'd rather try something a little more adventurous. Or, at least, something I couldn't easily cook at home.

Anyway, Unity Diner is a great restaurant. Yes, it's mostly all various forms of "fake" meats - you're not going here for a quinoa health kick - but the menu is inventive, varied, and delicious. The cocktail menu is superb.

The cost for a starter, two cocktails, a steak, a burger, and the tip came to about £80.

Secondly, after climbing a mountain of stairs, marvelling at the wonders therein, and being stared at by hundreds of monkeys - you're going to be hungry. So treat yourself to lunch at Rani's.

A varied vegetarian menu - helpfully illustrated. Great big piles of food served on a banana leaf - you can't go wrong. Just spicy enough to be interesting without being overpowering. Large jugs of daal and condiments. A wide variety of delicious drinks - including fresh-cut coconut.

Fast and friendly service. Incredible value for money, and heartily refreshing while you wait for your legs to recover.

They accept credit cards, but there is a minimum card charge. Oh well, just order more food. No free WiFi - so chat to your friends.

Then, without warning, my body decided that producing the human lactase enzyme was for losers. Stupid body! No more cheese for me 😭

The UK has come on leaps and bounds in the last 20 years. When I first became a salad-aficionado, the vegetarian options in most restaurants was either a mushroom risotto or to go hungry. Nowadays, even the most ardently pro-carnivore establishment has a range of veggie- and vegan-friendly dishes.

I am a dietary vegan. Due to my health condition, I abstain from milk. I saw a Tweet the other day which made me wonder how many people in the UK will become economic vegans?

Andy Barr

@10Yetis

Lots about milk prices in the media. I looked at @MyAlertr* to see the price increase from June21 to now.
2pint, blue top.
@Morrisons 🔼 58% (79p - £1.25)
@Tesco 🔼 43% (80p - £1.15)
@waitrose 🔼 34% (89p - £1.20)
@sainsburys 🔼 43% 80p - £1.15)
BTW. We track hundreds of prices pic.x.com/vqcvlkdfet

---

The price of dairy milk is now at parity with oat-milk and soya-milk. Yes, I'm sure there are some things for which plant milk is unsuitable. But if you're a "splash of white stuff in my coffee" kinda person, or "drench my cornflakes with something wet and tasty" milk user, then a swap to plant-milk may make economic sense.

(Yes, most plant milks are fortified with the vitamins and minerals you'd get from bio-lactations.)

Even if you ignore all the environmental benefits of switching from cow-milk to plant-milk, it's hard to ignore the benefit to your bank balance.

The meat-substitute "Quorn" was originally part of a programme to prevent mass-starvation. Researchers foresaw a population explosion and a meat-protein shortage. Without a cheap and nutritious source of protein, people would suffer.

At retail, Quorn is about £6/Kg for 13% protein. Beef mince is about £4.50/Kg for 18% protein. Textured vegetable protein (TVP) is about £5/kg for 47% protein. Chicken breast is about £6/Kg for 30% protein.

So, depending on your needs and preferences, it may save you money to switch to a vegetarian/vegan source of protein. Of course, their prices also fluctuate.

But, yeah, change is scary. If you know that you like one specific brand, you'll be reluctant to change.

If you have sensory issues, it might be difficult or impossible to try something else.

And, sure, learning how to cook something new is complicated. But a veggie burger is cooked in exactly the same way as a beef burger. And sandwich filler is just thin slices of pink "stuff".

To be clear, I don't really care if you go veggie or not. I do it for my own reasons - mostly health and ethical. And I'm sure your reasons for staying omnivorous make perfect sense to you.

Anyway, next time you're browsing the aisles of your supermarket, take a look at some of the vegan alternatives. Chances are you'll find some things are cheaper than the non-vegan equivalent.

It could really have done with a strong editor to tighten things up. The first two chapters are filler. There's a mini introduction to evolution and the basics of the theory of knowledge. I'm not really sure what they're doing there. It seems to be an attempt by the author to prove that he knows what he's talking about. While a short lesson in thermodynamics may be useful, it's just overkill here. The start of chapter three is in thrall to the Cult of St Jobs of Apple, but then finally starts talking about food production. Which is where things get interesting.

The book takes a long time to get to its central point - raising and slaughtering animals for meat is inefficient. It's a poor use of energy, water, crops, and space. We should be able to do better.

But then the book goes a bit off-piste. It returns to a graduate level intro to synthetic biology and modern day genetic manipulation. Again, interesting up to a point, but goes too far into the weeds for a book for the general public. There are some weird and inappropriate comments scattered through the chapters - he casually dismisses the concerns GMO opponents have about proprietary and secretive practices without ever acknowledging them. Similarly, he unfairly lumps vegans in with antivaxers. Despite hundreds of citations throughout the book, there's no footnote for that!

Then there's a bizarre section on meditation. I sort of get the tie in to hedonism and desires but again feels like a brain dump of padding out content.

Finally, we get an excellent chapter on "beyond food". He raises some interesting and exciting questions about the limits of our culinary imaginations. Why are we recreating burgers and steak when we could be making something better?

Annoyingly, it only lightly touches on the history of meat-replacement technology. For example, there's a paragraph about the technology behind Quorn - but nothing about how the population boom in the mid-20th century led to fears of mass starvation.

Can we "3D print" something similar to steak? Can we genetically engineer yeast to produce protiens similar to cheese? This book makes a powerful argument that the tech is nearly here and that it is a moral necessity.

I've been a vegetarian since the turn of the century - and I've tried loads of "meat substitutes". A Quorn burger, once drenched in ketchup, mustard, and pickles, doesn't taste any different from a beef burger. I've eaten the Beyond Meat burgers and, again, they're hardly any different from the existing veggie-burgers.

I get the need to make food for efficiently. And for new flavours, better textures, and more nutrition. The book does a reasonable job for explaining how we're going to get there. We're moving to a world where Synthetarianism is becoming mainstream. This raises interesting ethical questions. Sadly, the book doesn't touch on the ethics of this.

Reduction of meat consumption is probably necessary for our future on this planet - and our eventual off-world adventures. Once you get into this book, there are some excellent ideas and some fascinating science - but you'll need to skim through a lot before you reach the payoff.

Thanks to BookSirens for the review copy.

OK. But Why?

Food waste is a big issue. People throw away lots of perfectly edible food. They also discard tonnes of packaging. The next logical step, it seems to me, is to have edible packaging. Bananas are well known for their thick protective coating. It's just plant matter, so why can't it be eaten to help reduce waste? You add citrus fruit peel to all sorts of dishes for flavour, so why not give the humble 'nana a go?

OK. But How?

• Wait for your banana to ripen - it should have no green on it, and be going dark and spotty.
• Wash the unpeeled banana and dry it.
• Chop off a few cm from the top and bottom.
• Slice the peel away in strips.
• Eat banana!
• With the back of a knife, scrape off the inside layer of the banana peel and discard.
• Marinate

OK. But What?

I made a basic marinade. Big glug of dark Soy Sauce. Couple of dashes of tobasco. Squirt of golden syrup / honey. Sprinkle of smoked paprika and garlic powder. Basically, whatever flavours you'd like. Then leave for a couple of hours.

Then cook.

Heat up oil in a pan. Add strips.

Let it sizzle for about 90 seconds on each side.

Take from the pan and dry on some paper towels to remove excess oil.

Then eat.

OK. But Eat?

Yup! Try a little nibble first, just to make sure it's OK. Then munch. Try it on top of plain rice, or in a sandwich, or with an omelette, or... you know what? You're a clever cook, figure it out.

Tastes like bacon!

OK. But Bacon?

I'll cheerfully admit that this tastes as much like bacon as bacon-flavoured crisps do! It is a "flavour carrier" recipe. It's salty and spicy. If you over-cook it, then it is a bit like American crispy bacon in texture. Undercook it, and it's a bit like squidgy Danish bacon. Get it just right and it's a bit more like jerky.

Even when I was a meat eater, I'd find that lots of meat was essentially just the flavour of whatever sauce you drowned it in. A cheap cheese burger is the same taste as a cheap veggie burger - mostly salt, cheese, pickle, and herbs. Your barbecue pork mostly tastes of BBQ sauce, so why not swap for jackfruit?

OK. But Really?

Yes! Really! I've had this dish twice and haven't died yet. No indigestion or other weird symptoms. I don't really believe the claims that banana skins are somehow magically nutritious or will cure your weird disease. It's just a fun and unusual dish to cook - and results in marginally less food waste.

Try it, what have you got to lose?

I'd been getting frequent stomach cramps and "gastrointestinal distress" which culminated in a nice man from the NHS shoving a camera up me to see if my guts were rotten. They were not (aside from a couple of small polyps).

After various food diaries and testing exclusion diets, my worst fears were confirmed - I was lactose intolerant. No more cheese for me!

(To be clear, I haven't had a formal diagnosis. What with the pandemic, I haven't felt like strolling down to my GP and asking to be formally tested.)

So I've switched to a (mostly) vegan diet and it has been... fine! When I first became a vegetarian - the veggie options in most restaurants was either a salad or a Quorn burger fried in pig grease. Over the last two decade there has been an explosion in good veggie fare. It seems that every food-stall, high-end dining room, and everything in between has a multitude of options.

Of course, over the last year I've not been going out to restaurants - but I'm pleased to discover how many vegan options there are at supermarkets. Yes, I know I can boil a carrot - but sometimes it is nice to chuck together a meat-substitute stir-fry, or faux-hot-dog, or coconut-cheese-toasty.

Although I basically agree with veganism, I always thought it would be too much effort to go vegan full time. I was wrong! It has never been easier to be vegan (if you're in the UK and have enough money to buy from a major supermaket and have the time/energy to deal with a new way of cooking etc.)

I've used the HappyCow app to find vegan restaurants around the world. Everywhere from Beijing to Brisbane has seen a surge in vegan eateries.

I have two weaknesses though...

Eggs

I try to use aquafaba as an egg substitute in cooking. It just doesn't work that well. And a whole bunch of veggie food has egg in it. They're a ubiquitous ingredient in just about everything.

I know that the free-range, organic, well-loved chickens that provide my ova are eventually decapitated and turned unwillingly into food. Sorry chooks.

Honey

The controversial one! Seriously - you should read the history of whether honey is vegan. It's a fascinating look at the way society changes over time. Yay for moral relativism!

Obviously the worker-bees control the means of production. But I'm not sure if they're actually being exploited. Of course, most of the honey I buy is probably sugar syrup anyway.

Again, it's a near ubiquitous ingredient. I wonder if locally sourced honey is better for the environment than sugar brought in from far-off lands.

Should you go vegan?

I really don't care. Over the years, I've had uncountable numbers of meat-lovers advocate their lifestyle to me. But I don't think I've seen a veggie preach the good news about tofu. You can do what you want. But if you want to turn a side-salad into a main meal - now is an excellent time to make that change.

To be fair, it has been "nearly" here for a long long long long long time.

But with the imminent arrival of lab-grown meat, it is time to investigate Synthetarianism. A diet of Synthetic food.

I haven't eaten meat for... oh... 20 years now. I live with a carnivore but, despite her amazing cooking, I've no real desire to eat animal flesh. I'm sure it tastes nice to you, but my (smug) morals just don't allow it.

But is it morally OK to eat synthetic meat? I don't mean the mycoprotein based sausages and burgers that are ubiquitous nowadays. I mean steaks grown from animal cells.

One of the perils of the modern individualistic world, is that we don't have many moral leaders telling us what is and isn't acceptable. There is no High Priest of Veganism. So we're left to our own devices to determine what's acceptable to us.

It seems obvious to me that Synthetarianism is compatible with Vegetarianism. Taking milk from a cow or an egg from a chicken seems equivalent to taking a cell culture from a creature. Yes, it's nicer if the chicken is free-range, and the cow lives on a pleasant farm. But the animal probably still gets slaughtered at some point. Vegetarians (like me) are hypocrites.

But is it vegan?

There was a schism in veganism about whether honey is vegan. You should read the history - but I think it comes down to whether you feel the bees are exploited by the humans. Personally, I don't. I think we're in a symbiotic relationship with them, which is complicated. And we should probably stop colony collapse. But I don't think I have a problem with taking their honey.

A non-sentient animal can't make a choice about whether to donate cells. But suppose we could clone a chicken breast from, say, a discarded feather? That doesn't seem like much of a problem. Does it?

Which, of course, brings me on to cannibalism.

Would you eat human flesh grown this way? Someone inevitably will, once the tech gets cheap enough. Tweenage girls will clamour for a spare rib of their latest celebrity crush. Then the fad will go mainstream, as it always does. Curse you tweenage girls!

If it's consensual, where's the harm?

I suppose because it is hard to know whether it is truly consensual. Selling your body is often seen as problematic. It's also hard to determine provenance. Someone could be selling "Premium Blackpink Mince" when really it's offcuts of Nickelback. Poor old Nickelback, forced to sell their cloned flesh in order to pay back a dodgy record contract which has left them impoverished.

What if someone picks up one of your discarded snotty handkerchiefs, clones your body, and then eats "your" flesh? That doesn't sound consensual at all. So why should it be any different if it is an animal who is being cloned from discards?

You can't ever really know the reason whether someone else has freely entered into a contract.

Therefore, the only way Synthetarianism is compatible with Veganism, is via Autocannibalism.

Background

Schema.org is a metadata standard. You can include it on webpages to create structured, machine-readable data.

Here's a sample way of representing a Person:

{
  "@context": "https://schema.org/",
  "@type": "Person",
  "name": "Albert Einstein",
  "hasOccupation": [
    {
      "@type": "Occupation",
      "name": "Professor of Physics",
      "occupationLocation": {
        "@type": "Country",
        "name": "USA",
        "sameAs": "https://www.wikidata.org/wiki/Q30"
      }
    }
  ]
}

Hopefully easy to follow. This is a Person, they have a name and an occupation. That occupation has a name and is located in a country. That country has some linked data.

There are all sorts of properties we can associate with a Person - birth and death dates, memberships, nationality, credentials, tax ID, and even weight! See Schema.org/Person for a full list.

One which I think would be useful is a person's diet.

Diet

Schema already has the concept of a RestrictedDiet type. It lists things like Vegetarian, Halal, Kosher, Low Salt etc.

But it only applies to MenuItem and Recipe types. That is, I can mark up a restaurant's menu and say that this dish is Gluten Free, and that dish is Vegan friendly.

{
    "@context": "http://schema.org",
    "@type":"MenuItem",
    "name":"Potato Skins",
    "description":"Small serving of baked potato skins.",
    "offers":{
        "@type":"Offer",
        "price":"4.49",
        "priceCurrency":"GBP"
    },
    "suitableForDiet":[
        {
            "@type": "GlutenFreeDiet"
        },
        {
            "@type": "VeganDiet"
        }
    ]
}

My Use Cases

I maintain a personal contact site. I tell people my name, address, occupation, etc. I also want to inform other people that I am vegetarian.

• On a social network, it might be nice to have an (optional) feature where people give their dietary preferences.
• My Jewish and Muslim friends might want to automatically filter out the pork casserole recipes people post.
• My address book might suggest a restaurant which caters for my guests' preferences.
• An encyclopædia can show dietary restrictions of famous people.
• An airline could - with permission - read your social profile to select your meal for a flight.

Sample

Here's how I think it could work:

{
    "@context": "https://schema.org/",
    "@type": "Person",
    "name": "Terence Eden",
    "restrictedDiet": "http://schema.org/VegetarianDiet"
}

That is, just add restrictedDiet as a valid property of Person. I suppose it could be hasDiet or dietaryPreference or similar.

Your Use Cases

If you want to add your own use cases, or just think this is a good idea, please leave a comment on GitHub.com/schemaorg/schemaorg/issues/1996

So, I was in the "veggie snacks" aisle of my local supermarket. I grabbed some tofu bites, mushroom sausages, a bean burger - and then I saw this.

Terence Eden is on Mastodon

@edent

I'm a committed vegetarian, but I'm starting to come round to the meat lobby's point - albeit for opposite reasons.
I was about to grumble at Sainsburys for putting meaty snacks in the veggie aisle...!
Clearer labeling is needed, I reckon. pic.x.com/shg3rvvgsz

---

I was about to go on a tirade about co-mingling of veggie and non-veggie foods when I looked closer.

• BIG thing saying "Sausage"
• Teeny-tiny copy in a hard-to-read font saying "vegan"

How is anyone supposed to think this is anything other than an attempt to trick people into unwillingly buying a veggie-friendly product?

It was only in the course of writing this blog that I noticed the green "vegan" text in the bottom right corner.

And only when proof-reading the post that I spotted another tiny marketing sticker saying it's vegan. Can you find it? Maybe I'm blind to all the advertising on packaging - but I genuinely didn't see it.

Which brings me round to the meat lobby's latest complaint.

Apparently they want "veggie burgers" to be called "veggie discs" and "veggie sausages" to be called "tubes of processed vegetable matter." Or something like that.

It's obvious that the meat market is suffering as people turn away from eating dead animals. And, usually, I'd dismiss their protests as the wailing of a dying industry desperate to stay relevant.

And yet...

I've lost count of the times I've been in a restaurant in a foreign country, only to find the "vegetable burger" is really "meat burger served with vegetables". And I quite often find myself double-checking with wait-staff that they've understood I want the veggie lasagna. No, not even a little bit of meat, thank you.

"Hur-dur! Why dO yOu eAT ThInGs SHapEd liKE MEAT tHen!?"

I don't. There's nothing inherently meat-shaped about a circle. Or a tube. I eat things which are convenient to slip between two halves of a bun, or easy to pick up with chopsticks.

But as veggie products morph to be more palatable to carnivores, this confusion is going to grow.

Terence Eden is on Mastodon

@edent

Tried the @MMountainsFoods burger. They make some bold claims about it being "unlike any other veggie burger".
It is nice, but not remarkably different from most other ones I've tasted.
The beetroot juice in the middle makes it look a bit more like rare meat. Which is… fun? pic.x.com/b9ckja0f4o

---

A "bleeding" burger doesn't appeal to me - but obviously does to some people who feel threatened by the thought of being caught not eating meat.

So, do we need to change the language or insist on better descriptions? Here's a selection of "fake meats" I bought from the same aisle (I was hungry!) - they're all unambiguous in their provenance, I think.

On the other hand, I recently reviewed some Phoenix Drumsticks - a vegan chicken substitute.

I quite like the idea of eating Unicorn Burger, Dragon Ribs, and Sphinx Sausage.

Language changes. Burgers don't have to come from the Hamburg region of Germany, and they don't inherently have to be made of cow. Tastes change as well - I'm no longer the odd-one-out at a barbecue.

But while that change is occurring, I think it is important not to mislead people into eating something they'd rather not.

Oh, and the Fry's Vegan Sausage Rolls tasted bland, stodgy, and rather grim. Just like their meaty brethren.

So I was delighted to find a local store to me selling all manner of Chinese meat-substitutes - including these amazing looking "Chicken" Drumsticks!

I ordered a bunch and cooked them up.

The "bone" sticking out of the end is bamboo. Chewable and sweet - but probably not for swallowing unless you really need extra roughage in your system!

The processed "meat" around it is delicious. A perfectly spiced mix of protein, mushroom, veggies and miscellaneous stuff. As with lots of foods, it is the seasoning and texture which makes the meal.

What should we call this product?

The Chinese word for chicken is 鸡. But this product is sold as 鳳 - "phoenix" in traditional script. I love that.

There's a slightly silly discussion going on at the moment - "Veggie discs to replace veggie burgers in EU crackdown on food labels". Should veggie things be allowed to name themselves after meaty things?

Is a disc of mushed veggies, or mushroom, or mycoprotein, a burger? Yes. I don't know any normal part of a healthy animal which is shaped like a burger. And the bits of animals shaped like hotdogs are rarely eaten.

I've eaten vegetarian food around the world and, yes, it can be confusing going to a restaurant in a foreign country and not knowing if the "Gemüse Lasagne" is actually vegetarian or merely served with vegetables.

It is weird going to a veggie restaurant and being served "mock duck" and "mock beef" and all manner of things which aren't-really-meat-but-we-need-to-pretend-they-are-for-some-reason. I get that we often refer to new things by comparing them to the things we already know.

I don't really care if the stuff I'm eating is called "Fakon" or fake bacon or textured soya strips in paprika or Dragon Flank. As long as that Ⓥ symbol is prominent, I think we can all enjoy the foods we want.

There are many interesting social aspects to this future. Is lab-grown meat kosher or halal? Would eating human-meat be cannibalism? Is it vegetarian?

But, most importantly, what do we call people with a dietary preference for in-vitro meat?

Back in 2005, a blogger suggested "synthetarian". A portmanteau of synthetic and vegetarian.

The word has an interesting history. The earliest online reference I can find is from 2002 - a user on the Startopia game message-board discussing alien dietary requirements.

Except for the peeps that eat synthetic food (Energerian? Synthetarian?)

The earliest offline reference I can find is an otherwise unremarkable short sci-fi story from 1953.

In "The Model Of A Judge" by William Morrison, a curious alien creature has been domesticated. An experience he doesn't find particularly pleasant...

... he could remember the old feeling of pleasure, the delight of sinking his teeth into an animal he had brought down himself, the savage joy of gulping the tasty flesh. He didn't eat raw meat any more; he didn't eat meat at all. He had been conditioned against it. He was now half vegetarian, half synthetarian. His meals were nourishing, healthful, and a part of his life he would rather not think about.

Dietary fads come and go. With the news that 12% of people in the UK are vegetarian or vegan it isn't hard to imagine a future where the majority of people prefer a mainly synthetarian diet.

It's an odd word, no doubt, but I predict it will become increasingly popular.

That's why I was overjoyed at ODF Plugfest Rome when the organisers made this announcement:

Terence Eden is on Mastodon

@edent

"All lunch boxes will be vegan (so that everyone can eat everything)"

THANK YOU! #LibOCon17 #odfplugfest Sensible inclusive policy. pic.x.com/zuqf0h14hx

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It was such a thoughtful thing for the event to do. We each got some fresh pasta, some salad, fruit, biscuits. Lovely!

(As an aside, yes, allergies and intolerances were catered for separately.)

Everyone I spoke to at the event was happy with the food. I didn't notice anyone sneaking off to one of the hundreds of pizza restaurants in the vicinity.

As someone who has run large scale events before, I think making an event mono-culinary is an excellent idea.

• Cheaper. Vegan / Veggie food is cheaper than meaty alternatives. A huge consideration when running a community event trying to cater for a few hundred people.
• Logistically easier. I've lost count of the number of events I've been to where organisers have misplaced the details of who has requested which meal, or where meat-eaters have accidentally polished off the food meant for veggies.
• Suitable for nearly all dietary preferences - vegetarian, Kosher, Halal, Hinduism, Buddhism. Means not having to quiz people on their ethical beliefs.
• Healthier. A typical hackathon just provides pizza and beer. That's fun, but not always the healthiest option available.

If you're planning on catering for a mass event, have a think about whether only providing vegan food will be a sensible and inclusive way to feed your attendees.

Here be dragons

Lots of people are psychologically addicted to meat. When you politely suggest they skip meat for a single meal, they have an extreme reaction. A huge amount of marketing money has been spent on associating meat with masculinity. This causes a form of castration-anxiety when people are "threatened" with a salad.

It's a little silly seeing grown adults tremble at the thought of vegetables, but that's the power of marketing!