Algorithm Induced Alcoholism

I like beer.

I like the Internet.

What if I could get beer using the Internet?!?!

A few years ago I purchased a mixed crate of beer online. I unticked all the checkboxes for marketing messages - but incautiously allowed them to send me special offers.

Every couple of months, they'd send me an email offering discount beer. And I'd ignore it. Mostly because I was still slowly working my way through the last crate.

But one day their marketing algorithm obviously decided that I was about to become a lost prospect and sent me an irresistible offer. "We miss you! Please enjoy a crate of 36 craft beers for £40."

Nice! I certainly won't look a gift-beer in the bottle. So I grabbed the bargain and stuck the tinnies in the cupboard.

And then the algorithm went haywire.

Every day - every single day - since placing my order, I've received a marketing message from the company. "Don't miss out on this exclusive case!" or "Our top beers - hand picked for you!" or "URGENT! Last few cases remaining at this price!" or "The ULTIMATE taste test - which will you choose?" or "20% discount if you order TODAY" or "Christmas is coming - stock up now!"

I get it. The CRM has detected that I'm a live prospect and willing to spend money - therefore they must capture my value before I churn. I don't know if they know how quickly I can drink 36 beers. I don't know if they know how much shelf space I have. And I don't know if they know that I dislike being bombarded with adverts.

What I do know that they know is the UK rules around advertising of alcohol promotions.

When it comes to consumer promotions with a multiple purchase mechanic promoters need to ensure that the number of items that need to be bought does not encourage consumers to exceed Department of Health guidelines for safe drinking and they should keep up to date with these guidelines. They should also ensure that the duration of the promotion is long enough to allow consumers to participate without drinking excessively or irresponsibly

Interestingly, all the marketing emails came to me in the evening. Presumably because the guidelines also say:

Alcohol promotions that could encourage a style of drinking that is unwise, for example encouraging people to drink at breakfast or early in the day, are likely to be problematic

There's an old complaint about being shown adverts for things you've already purchased. It is mostly down to lazy marketers using retargeting and is usually little more than an annoyance. But continually messaging people encouraging them to buy alcohol feels like it could cause harm.

Alcohol can be addictive. As can A/B testing your customers to see which messaging resonates with the target demographic. Advertisers - know your limits!

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I know you might think I'm exaggerating - but here's a fortnight's worth of emails from online beer merchant Flavourly:

I hadn't checked the inbox for a month, hence the build-up of crap before I could unsubscribe.