My long journey to replace my teeth is (I hope) at an end. Last week, my lovely dentist fitted my two custom-made teeth. After all the months of drilling, screwing, photographing, x-raying, and prodding, the last fitting was little more than gluing. I now have two colour-matched gnashers installed in my bonce. And all my brain can do is scream… ARGH! THERE'S SOMETHING IN MY MOUTH! The first f…
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A glistening pool of blood gently wept from the body. Crimson gore sparkled under rapid flash photography as it loosely clung to the wounds. So many wounds. Too many for this to have been an accident. "Bite marks," said the forensics officer. "A lot of bite marks." The detective peered at the ragged corpse. It was barely recognisable as human; just a series of holes where flesh ought to be. …
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Several years ago, I had a CT scan of my jaw. The dentist wasn't sure if she was allowed to give me a copy of the scan, which led me to ask "who owns the copyright to my medical images?" I still don't have an answer to the copyright question - but I do now have a copy of a CT scan! Last week - following some dental trauma - I had another scan of my head. The dentist took great delight in…
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You know that ice-breaker game "Two Truths And A Lie"? When I'm forced into some mandatory office fun, I always say... I've sat in the seat of a space shuttle. I still have two of my baby teeth. I used to be a voice-over artist. Well, one of those truths is about to come crashing down. When I was younger, I had two of my adult teeth removed. They were coming out at such a crazy angle that…
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When I was a kid, I had two of my adult teeth surgically removed. As such, I still have two of my baby teeth. And, as I get older, they're starting to wear down. At every dental check-up my dentist prods them, gives them a wiggle, and sometimes takes an x-ray. "Well," they say, "They're fine for now…" The "for now" is getting closer with every visit. At my last visit, the dentist started to t…
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