It was a quick and dirty hackday project. Ever since, I've had the hankering to build something a bit more generic. I currently use Untappd to check into beer and Vivino for wine.

I'd like to be able to check in to:

• Artwork
• Boardgames
• Cheese
• ... Things beginning with "D"...?

So, here's my half-day hack to make that happen. Code quality is awful!

Terence Eden is on Mastodon

@edent

Checked in to Rollright
That's a mighty fine cheese!
thecourtyarddairy.co.uk/shop/buy-chees…thecourtyarddairy.co.uk
Rollright cheese – Reblochon-style, soft, rich and buttery.
Rollright cheese: soft, rich and buttery. Buy online and find out more about Manor Farm’s Rollright cheese - a brilliant alternative to Reblochon.

---

Minimum Viable Check-In

At the most basic level, we need a list of things. A user searches through the list, finds the artwork / boardgame / movie / cheese, then posts it to their preferred social network.

That's pretty simple. Perhaps too simple. You might just as well type "Mmmm, delicious Cambanzola!"

I suppose a list gives you certainty of spelling. Ideally it should also have a canonical URl to share. Other metadata (who made it, image, price, style) can wait for now.

Users

The next thing we need is a way for users to register with the platform. Or do we? What a user really wants to do is...

• Check in to something.
• Retrieve their previous check ins.

Things like comparing with friends, recommendations, badges, mayors, cheeses near you, they can all wait until later.

So - for our awesome alpha we want

1. A database of "things"
2. A database of "users"
3. A database of "user checked into this thing at this time and left this message"

My database-fu is puny, but this should be simple enough.

SHOW COLUMNS FROM things;
+------------+--------------+-----+
|   Field    |     Type     | Key |
+------------+--------------+-----+
| ID         | varchar(36)  | PRI |
| Name       | varchar(128) | UNI |
| Metadata1  | TINYTEXT     |     |
| Metadata2  | TINYTEXT     |     |
+------------+--------------+-----+

(I suppose at some point we'll want a foreign key for "Group who makes the thing" - for manufacturers and such like. But that can wait.)

Next, the users:

SHOW COLUMNS FROM users;
+------------+--------------+-----+
|   Field    |     Type     | Key |
+------------+--------------+-----+
| ID         | varchar(36)  | PRI |
| UserName   | varchar(128) | UNI |
| Metadata1  | TINYTEXT     |     |
+------------+--------------+-----+

(Again, we will probably want to store social media, email, passwords, avatar photos, in the future.)

Finally - storing the check-in themselves:

SHOW COLUMNS FROM checkins;
+---------+--------------+-----------+
|  Field  |     Type     |    Key    |
+---------+--------------+-----------+
| ID      | varchar(36)  | PRI       |
| time    | DATETIME     |           |
| userID  | varchar(36)  | users.id  |
| thingID | varchar(36)  | things.id |
| comment | TINYTEXT     |           |
+---------+--------------+-----------+

Let's Build This Thing!

CHeck-in as an Extremely Easy SErvice. Or, CHEESE for short.

Because I'm lazy, I'm going to use the Open Source HybridAuth to handle user registration. It allows people to sign in with a variety of social network logins. For the MVP, let's just use Twitter.

Creating the Databases

Using mySQL because why not. Obviously don't use password as your password. Move fast, break things.

CREATE DATABASE CHEESE;

USE CHEESE;

CREATE USER 'cheeser'@'localhost' IDENTIFIED BY 'password';
GRANT INSERT ON CHEESE . * TO 'cheeser'@'localhost';
GRANT SELECT ON CHEESE . * TO 'cheeser'@'localhost';

CREATE TABLE users(
   user_id VARCHAR(36) NOT NULL,
   twitter_username VARCHAR(128) NOT NULL,
   twitter_id VARCHAR(128) NOT NULL,
   PRIMARY KEY ( user_id )
);

CREATE TABLE cheeses(
   cheese_id VARCHAR(36) NOT NULL,
   cheese_name VARCHAR(128) NOT NULL,
   cheese_url VARCHAR(128) NOT NULL,
   PRIMARY KEY ( cheese_id )
);

CREATE TABLE checkins(
   checkin_id VARCHAR(36) NOT NULL,
   checkin_time DATETIME NOT NULL,
   user_id VARCHAR(36) NOT NULL,
   cheese_id VARCHAR(36) NOT NULL,
   comment TINYTEXT,
   PRIMARY KEY( checkin_id ),
   FOREIGN KEY( user_id ) references users( user_id ),
   FOREIGN KEY( cheese_id ) references cheeses( cheese_id )
);

Fill the Database with cheeses!

Did this manually for a dozen fromages.

INSERT into cheeses VALUES
   (UUID(), "Gorwydd Caerphilly", "https://www.thecheesesociety.co.uk/product/gorwydd-caerphilly/");

Ending up with something like this:

select * from cheeses;
+--------------------------------------+----------------------+-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------+
| cheese_id                            | cheese_name          | cheese_url                                                                                          |
+--------------------------------------+----------------------+-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------+
| 48695c1b-1ad5-11e7-bfe7-a417319d3fd1 | Gorwydd Caerphilly   | https://www.thecheesesociety.co.uk/product/gorwydd-caerphilly/                                      |
| b1c19c27-1ad5-11e7-bfe7-a417319d3fd1 | Isle of Mull Cheddar | http://www.internationalcheese.co.uk/products/isle-of-mull-cheddar#.WERTzHWLTcc                     |
| c17ea994-1ad5-11e7-bfe7-a417319d3fd1 | Wellesley            | http://www.hillfarmdairy.co.uk/our-cheese/                                                          |
| d080a5bc-1ad5-11e7-bfe7-a417319d3fd1 | Wigmore              | http://www.villagemaidcheese.co.uk/wigmore_main.html                                                |
| e127fe73-1ad5-11e7-bfe7-a417319d3fd1 | Rollright            | https://www.thecourtyarddairy.co.uk/shop/buy-cheese/soft-cheese-smelly-cheese/buy-rollright-cheese/ |
| ed6bf65f-1ad5-11e7-bfe7-a417319d3fd1 | Tunworth             | http://hampshirecheeses.co.uk/our-cheeses/                                                          |
+--------------------------------------+----------------------+-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------+

Let users register

Again, super basic, barebones, no real UI. Visit this website, log into Twitter, get your ID registered in the users database.

    //  Setup for HybridAuth
    $config = dirname(__FILE__) . '/hybridauth-2.9.1/hybridauth/config.php';
    require_once( "hybridauth-2.9.1/hybridauth/Hybrid/Auth.php" );

    function insert($tw_name,$tw_id)
    {
        //  Connect to the Database
        $mysqli = new mysqli("localhost", "cheeser", "password", "CHEESE");
        if ($mysqli->connect_errno) {
            echo "Failed to connect to MySQL: (" . $mysqli->connect_errno . ") " . $mysqli->connect_error;
        }

        //  Does this already exist?
        $mysqli = new mysqli("localhost", "cheeser", "password", "CHEESE");
        $stmt = $mysqli->prepare("SELECT twitter_username FROM users WHERE twitter_id = ?");
        $stmt->bind_param("s",$tw_id);
        $stmt->execute();
        $stmt->bind_result($result);
        $stmt->fetch();
        if ($result == null) {
            //  Generate a GUID for the user
            $guid = guidv4();

            $stmt = $mysqli->prepare("INSERT INTO users(user_id, twitter_username, twitter_id) VALUES (?, ?, ?)");
            $stmt->bind_param('sss', $guid, $tw_name, $tw_id);

            $stmt->execute();

        }
        /* close statement and connection */
        $stmt->close();
        /* close connection */
        $mysqli->close();
    }

    function guidv4()
    {
        //  See http://php.net/manual/en/function.com-create-guid.php
        $data = random_bytes(16);   // PHP7+ only
        assert(strlen($data) == 16);
        $data[6] = chr(ord($data[6]) & 0x0f | 0x40); // set version to 0100
        $data[8] = chr(ord($data[8]) & 0x3f | 0x80); // set bits 6-7 to 10

        //  Magic
        return vsprintf('%s%s-%s-%s-%s-%s%s%s', str_split(bin2hex($data), 4));
    }


    try{
        $hybridauth = new Hybrid_Auth( $config );

        $twitter = $hybridauth->authenticate( "Twitter" );

        $user_profile = $twitter->getUserProfile();
        $tw_name = $user_profile->displayName;
        $tw_id = $user_profile->identifier;


        echo "Hi there! " . $tw_name;
        insert($tw_name,$tw_id);
        //$twitter->setUserStatus( "testing!" );

    }
    catch( Exception $e ){
        echo "Ooophs, we got an error: " . $e->getMessage();
    }

Do The Check In!

We now end up with:

select * from checkins;
+--------------------------------------+---------------------+--------------------------------------+--------------------------------------+----------------------------+
| checkin_id                           | checkin_time        | user_id                              | cheese_id                            | comment                    |
+--------------------------------------+---------------------+--------------------------------------+--------------------------------------+----------------------------+
| 02463e2b-0052-40de-a105-ab59e8e8af6c | 2017-04-06 16:15:27 | c9c6ca60-66c5-4666-a632-0efac6957ef3 | e127fe73-1ad5-11e7-bfe7-a417319d3fd1 | That rollright was lovely. |
+--------------------------------------+---------------------+--------------------------------------+--------------------------------------+----------------------------+

Post it to Twitter

Terence Eden is on Mastodon

@edent

Checked in to Rollright
Perhaps the perfect cheese. Strong! 5🌟
thecourtyarddairy.co.uk/shop/buy-chees…thecourtyarddairy.co.uk
Rollright cheese – Reblochon-style, soft, rich and buttery.
Rollright cheese: soft, rich and buttery. Buy online and find out more about Manor Farm’s Rollright cheese - a brilliant alternative to Reblochon.

---

That's it!

We can display a user's history, and allow them to check in to further cheeses. Lean in!

Look, there's nothing special about Check-In apps. As long as you have a fairly well sourced database of "things" you can pretty much build one in an afternoon. This was built over a couple of hours, interspersed with sampling cheese and wine. And my code quality shows!

Peter Chamberlin

@pgchamberlin

Checked in to Gorwydd Caerphilly
I actually have Reblochon but it's not in the dropdown.
thecheesesociety.co.uk/product/gorwyd…

---

I Would Like My One Billion Dollar Of VC Funding Now Please.

What is Cheesemas?

Last year we held a wine tasting. Which is a posh way of saying that we bought lots of bottles of nice wine, printed out tasting notes, and pretended we knew what we were talking about.

This is the same. But with cheese. LOTS of cheese.

Where to get lots of good cheese?

Luckily, a Cheesemonger has opened a shop nearby - Jericho Cheese. Serving a selection of the finest British & Irish cheeses. This is what their shop counter looks like:

SO. MUCH. CHEESE.

I spent a happy hour talking with the proprietor, sampling the cheeses, and deciding on the 10 that would be good enough to serve to my friends.

Not just cheese, right?

Temping as that was... We laid a table with an array of crudités, breads, crackers, chutneys, pickles and assorted nibbles. All served up in little bamboo boats.

The cheese rested for a couple of hours before the party.

I also printed out a bunch of tasting notes from the web. I don't think many people read them though!

And to drink?

Naturally, it is crucial to pair the right wine with the right cheese.

It turns out that most wine goes well with cheese! As does port. And Cucumber gin. And prosecco. I accidentally mixed a splash of Scotch with a full glass of Champagne and found my new favourite cocktail! I really need to get cheaper tastes...

List of cheeses

Here's what we had.

• Gorwydd Caerphilly
  • A clean tasting, uncomplicated cheese. Very munchable.
• Isle of Mull Cheddar
  • A decent cheddar. I prefer mine to be a little more aged and tangy. But nothing wrong with this.
• Wellesley
  • Perfect little goat's cheese. Crumbly and fun.
• Wigmore
  • Easy to see why this is a multi award-winner. Flavour and texture in a perfect combination.
• Rollright
  • The best damn cheese of the evening. Strong, sultry, runny, and overpowering.
• Tunworth
  • A British Camembert. Everyone remarked on how it was one of the finest camemberts they'd tasted. Not a single scrap of it left by the end of the night.
• Sinodun Hill
  • A goat's cheese pyramid. Lovely flavour, but not a huge hit. Plenty left at the end of the evening.
• Colston Bassett Stilton
  • The only Stilton worth eating. Everything else is a pale imitation. Pungent and powerful.
• Stichelton
  • Another blue cheese, very similar to the Stilton - but richer and creamier.
• Spenwood
  • Slightly underwhelming on reflection. Hard to compete with so many strong flavours.
• Innes Log
  • Goat's cheese log. Not massively exciting, but a good solid cheese to go on a cracker.

Not from Jericho Cheese

Some of our guest bought along their own cheesy comestibles.

• Blacksticks White - a fine little blue cheese. Not as strong as the others.
• Cheese Strings - an abomination. Included ironically. Inedible.
• Babybel - a palate cleanser. Marginally more tasty than the wax it is wrapped in.
• Primula - a nostalgia cheese. Utterly inoffensive.

Cost

I asked Jericho Cheeses for 10 different cheeses, about £20 worth each. I figured that would be enough for the two-dozen people at the party. We ended up with 11 cheeses for £198 and, despite our guests' best efforts, a fridge full of the remnants!

Not bad! Cheaper than a wine tasting evening, at any rate.

Aftermath

My mate Stu now knows exactly how much cheese and wine the human body can contain without a critical storage failure.

A few weeks ago, I blogged about seeing Russell Howard's Good News. I was (only slightly) gutted not to have appeared on the broadcast version of the show.

Then, this morning, one of my colleagues stopped me in the lift...

Hey! Saw you on TV last night talking about Dorset Blue Vinney.

And so he did!

You can watch the full episode for the next few days on iPlayer - skip straight to 54 minutes in to see my bit.

Big thanks to Russell Howard and the Good News team for making my day.

Becca

@beccameatsix

I'm gonna marry Russell Howard. CHEESELORD! "you and me are gonna Cover ourselves in cheese And then smother ourselves in ferrero rocher xD

---

Bekka Allison

@beks_wade

Watching previous episodes of Russell Howard! #cheeselord #ferrororocher

---

K

@Kittybliss

#cheeselord #goodnews

---

Threezoz

@selfodium

Watching repeats! #CheeseLord #GoodNews

---

On Tuesday, as a birthday treat, I managed to snaffle some tickets for Russell Howard's Good News. While I'm a great admire of his, I hadn't seen the show before and didn't really know what to expect.

During any show, there are slack moments where cameras have to be repositioned, lights adjusted or other bits of TV nonsense. Normally it's up to the warm-up act to keep the audience entertained - however Russell is obviously no slouch in the comedy department and kept up a witty banter with the audience throughout. At one point he was asking what we'd spend a £45 million Lotto win on.

Bizarrely, in a moment of silence while the audience contemplated a win of this magnitude, I shouted

CHEESE!

I struggle to think why. Why did I shout "Cheese!"? Why, when he asked what variety of cheese, I replied "Dorset Blue Vinney". For some reason, it was the only one of the Cheese Shop Sketch cheeses I can remember.

As a testament to how popular twitter is now, before I'd even made the train home I received this tweet.

Tom Kendall

@zanytk

Replying to @edent@edent I'm gunna rub Dorset blue vinnie all over you!

---

Still, at least no-one tried to get me laid! Note: That link is dead. I think it was from someone talking about how Russell tried to set them up with another audience member.

Sadly, the bit was cut from the TV screening - much to the consternation of some audience members.

Jess

@jessyka19

Replying to @howardhour@bbcgoodnews YOU LEFT CHEESEMAN OUT, HOW DARE YOU! :@ best bit!

---

Do yourself a favour, apply for tickets to some of the shows on offer. Big name shows like Strictly Come Dancing often fill up quickly - but it's easy to get free tickets for sitcoms, pilots and game-shows. As well as a great night's entertainment you also run the very small chance of seeing the back of your head during the closing credits!