Book Review: Refuse to Choose! A Revolutionary Program for Doing Everything That You Love - Barbara Sher

I am decidedly unconvinced by this book.

What do you do when you are too interested in the world? This is a problem I have; everything is interesting¹! How do you pick? What if I spend time studying the wrong thing? What if I never complete any of my madcap projects? How do I pick and choose?

This book purports to help "Scanners"² get their lives in order. I sort-of identify with that - so can this book help me regain focus and get on with my life? No. Not really.

Essentially, it is a "feel-good" book masquerading as "self-help":

Now that I’ve grown up, I realize that all that delicious dilettantism pays its way as much as any degree in medicine or engineering, by making me remember every day—whenever I pick up a book or watch the Science Channel or try to read a map of Asia for no particular reason—that life is amazing and there is no end to the wonder of it.

It is relentlessly positive and, ironically, a bit scattershot. It has some very specific analogue solutions to the problems people face. It is an older book - although it does reference the Internet - so some of the solutions can quite easily be translated into digital "to do" lists and blogs.

The core advice boils down to "write things down. Return to them if they spark interest again. Find jobs which have broad appeal."

Let’s end the notion that ideas have no value unless they turn into a business or have some other practical use. Save them all in a beautiful book like Leonardo did. You might want to give them away someday, perhaps to someone who needs an idea.

I do like its core message. And there are some delightful analogies buried away in there:

A house painter leaves when he’s through painting the house; he doesn’t move in and live there.

But as well as being technologically outdated, the book is very tied to a specific culture. It is suffused with religion, family, and The American Dream. It felt rather alienating and offputting to me. It has a chintzy, homespun ethos which I found a bit grating. And, as lots of American self-help books do, it was filled with endless praise for the author. There were large passages of cloying letters-to-the-author which I had to skip.

If you are able to cut through the fluff, and mentally update the advice, there are some great nuggets of wisdom in there. I especially liked this one:

If you want to think clearly, be calm and be smart; schedule a Micro Nervous Breakdown at least once a day.

Do you know? I think I might just have one now!