How many of my colleagues are replicants?


I hate the way modern workplaces make you beg for feedback. Something about the forcing of humanity into little boxes and vague sentiments really gets my goat.

So, this year, I added an extra question to my validation-seeking questionnaire. As well as asking how I did this year, what I could do better, where we can work together in the future etc etc blah blah - I added a little bonus. A multiple choice question from the Voight-Kampff test.

And, to my delight, my colleagues answered!

You're in a desert walking along in the sand, when all of a sudden you look down and see a tortoise crawling toward you. You reach down and flip it over onto its back. The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs, trying to turn itself over, but it can't. Not without your help. But you are not helping. Why is that? Answers available are Is this the test now? What desert? Tortoise? What's that? Do you make up these questions or do they write them down for you? What do you mean, I'm not helping?

What does this say about my colleagues? Only that they're all good sports and I'm almost certain fewer than three of them are replicants. Which is pretty good for a modern workplace.

OK, there's a semi-serious side to this. Work can be a little dull and dehumanising. We're more than just robots clicking next on little boxes. I think it is important to pepper life with small interludes of silliness and joy. Even if, sometimes, you're the only one laughing.


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