There’s been lots of talk recently of the dearth of women attending technical conferences. This problem is blown out of all proportion! There are many excellent reasons to attend an all-male tech event:
- Reduced chance of having an affair while away on business
- ⚤ Hetrosexuals only!
- Won’t accidentally mistake a CEO for a cocktail waitress
- 💁🍸 embarrassing!
- Excellent networking opportunities in the long queue for the men’s toilets 🚽🚹
- ⚣ Possible risk of inadvertent homosexuality!
- Impossible to sexually harass people who aren’t there
- 📵 Still possible via social media though! 🤳
- Getting blind drunk and pissing in a public fountain is unlikely to upset anyone of a delicate constitution
- Watch out for lady-policemen! 👮♀️
- No distracting breasts. Dudes never say “My eyes are up here!”
- Pectoral muscles should be admired, obviously! 🏋️♂️
- “Guys” is a perfectly acceptable term for a group of people.
- Goes double if any of them are actually named “Guy”! 🤼♂️
- The strippers you oggle at a supplier’s exhibition booth don’t have an intimidating amount of technical knowledge
- Do double check they’re not spies though! 👯♀️🕵️
- All the t-shirt shwag will be properly sized for your manly body
- Although you won’t be able to bring one home for the missus! 👕
- Chaps are just better!
Look, do I need to spell out that this is satire? Well, it would be, if it weren’t so terrifyingly real.
Yeah I can say this is a thing I expect now, which is sad! It sucks to go to tech conferences as a lady knowing someone, somewhere is going to hit on me. I'm just here for the technical information, dude.
— Sarah (@fevered) November 7, 2018
This. I’ve been mistaken for a waitress at a conference. (In which I gave a plenary talk.) https://t.co/4lhH2yKL6m
— ProfDr Kay Kirkpatrick🥄 (@kay314159) February 11, 2018
One of the few upsides of being a woman at a Tech conference is that during breaks there is never a queue for the toilets..
— Faintdreams (@faintdreams) September 6, 2018
Hey guy friends, I just want to say that if you came onto a woman at a conference and it was not welcome, you owe her an apology. I have so many bad memories of this happening to me again and again in my 30's that now I'm in my 40's I still hold a grudge. I hope you all grew up.
— phoenix perry (@phoenixperry) September 24, 2018
My mum was once described as a "lady policeman". And my ex, a charge nurse was once described as a "make sister" 😂😂😂
— Justine 🏴🦄🐴 (@poorponyowner) October 19, 2017
To men who splain me on how „guys” is gender neutral while purchasing a ticket to my conference—I will gladly void your ticket. Bye.
— fantastic ms. (@fox) February 8, 2018
@i4_1 The number of times I've been to a tech conference and found I'm the only woman there who isn't a 'booth babe' is truly depressing
— Charlotte Jee (@charlottejee) September 13, 2013
I've decided I'm not taking shirts from conferences anymore unless they're women's fit. This "unisex" crap is terrible if you have boobs.
— ashe dryden (@ashedryden) August 26, 2011
The conference had at least 30% men, I don't think they can be criticized for the gender representation. They just picked the best speakers the had available based on merit.
The guys were great, too. I won't hear any arguments that including them was tokenism.
— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 6, 2018